Pinky Promise--Taekook

dont hmu

Over the weekend I continued to ignore everyone, I'd never actually made it to Namjoon's. I focused on sleeping, which was enough to keep me content.

When Monday came around, I still had three days to do nothing. I didn't know what to do. I was so bored.

I decided to look through Tae's book more.

10.5.15

Why am I at the hospital?

you tired to kill yourself.

right.

10.15.15

You need to get better.

Taehyung.

Where did you go?

The next page was covered in scribbles the words 'leave me alone' scribbled in red.

10.20.15

stop sending me away.

stop hurting yourself.

stop making me do it.

10.29.15

I made a friend. He reminds me of Yongbok. His name is Han. He looks like a squirrel.

The next few pages were full of doodles of two people. One in purple crayon, the other in green.

I flip the page and saw a Polaroid of the two smiling. Tae had a nice smile, and the other boy did indeed look like a squirrel but in a cute way.

Have I ever seen him smile?

I don't think so.

11.03.15

Can't I go to school?

No. You're not well.

I'll get better when I'm away from you.

Who was this? His therapist? They seemed to talk in this book a lot.

11.21.15

Han died today. He killed himself. Why does this happen to me? I should've done something. Why do they keep dying?

12.07.15

I'm not going to talk.

you make me uncomfortable.

you want me to make eye contact.

12.10.15

Im scared of the dark.

The next page was full of doodles and a paper receipt. I flip the page again; it was pictures of Han.

12.18.15

Han's mother gave these to me. I'll keep them forever.

12.20.15 

I hate Christmas.

Why?

My family doesn't get along.

why?

stuff.

Do you like to celebrate?

No, we don't have money for stuff.

What's something you'd want?

New supplies.

No that's something you need.

New shoes?

Taehyung.

I don't know. Noise canceling headphones.

12.25.15I'm not home

The page was filled with a sketch of Taehyung on a roof top, looking at the street below.

01.01.16

ew

I close the book.

Taehyung had a lot going on. He was so shy...but under that his personality was so interesting.

Maybe I should ask him to hangout after school? No, that might be weird.