There's something beautiful about the art of moving on. You've experienced it now for the last couple of years and though you can't say you feel happier, you definitely don't feel worse.
You hoped that you could live on with your life never having...
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09 PRESENT DAY SEOUL
You remember times as a child when you would sit across from someone you look up to and they would just look at you waiting as if you had something to say. You would squirm in your seat wondering if there was bad news or if maybe you were getting in trouble about something but they wouldn't give you an answer. They would just expect you to know what they wanted you to say and sure, sometimes you did know when you were in the wrong and would speak up about it... but other times you would just start to look back on every little thing you've done to try and find what it was they wanted you to admit.
That's how you felt right now with Namjoon sitting across from you at this tiny restaurant that was so loud you felt overwhelmed. He wanted you to tag along with him after the picnic and he's yet to say why but you can just tell there's something on the top of his tongue that he wanted to say or ask.
"How's work? I feel like we haven't had an actual one on one in a while," Namjoon said casually as he poured more water into your glass.
"Not bad," you shrugged, "We just finished up a video shoot and it should be uploaded this Friday so I'll have some down time before the next project. You?"
"It's been crazy at the office, we're getting a new CEO and there's already been a shit ton of budget cuts, some people are scared to lose their jobs and I feel bad. There's not much I can do to make any of them feel more assured, y'know?" Namjoon said, getting a little bit of his stress off his mind. He worked at an eCommerce company that made global sales and deals as a marketing strategy manager so he's usually more busy than the rest of you. You assumed this late meal was some sort of way to get things off his chest about work. He needed you to listen as a friend, that's all.
"Are you seeing anyone?" Namjoon tried to ask casually but the look you sent him had him reeling back, "Let me rephrase that... have you talked to anyone lately?"
You hummed in thought, stalling your answer for as long as possible before saying, "Haven't had the chance to because of work."
"What do you think of Jiyoung's new boyfriend?"
Your hand stopped midair as you went to take a bite of your food. This was what he wanted to talk about.
Snapping back into reality, you finished your task and shrugged, "He's alright, doesn't really matter what I think, right?"
"I guess that's true," Namjoon said calmly, "But I was just thinking about earlier when we were all talking about how we met the last person we dated and you said you didn't remember, right? It just reminded me that it really has been a long time since you seriously dated someone."
You released a dry laugh, "You sound like all the aunties who ask why women aren't married with kids yet."
You were just joking in hopes that Namjoon just laughing and moving on but you could see how determined he looked to say what he wanted to say. Once again you were brought back to your childhood days when they would dance around the questions waiting for you to just come out and say what they wanted to hear. Something inside you is telling you Namjoon knows exactly what he wants to talk to you about but you're not going to say anything. You'll play dumb for as long as you can. He's an observer, he catches on to things quickly and if he wasn't in his current career path you have no doubt that he would've pursued something to do with psychology. He's just that good at reading and understanding others.
