path of redemption

Ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ－ｏｎｅ.

-Estella romano

Tw : mentions of self harm ⚠️

Looking into the mirror first thing in the mornings was one of the most awful and best things in the world. As i examine myself . Head to toe. I take in my shoulder lenght hair. My thick thighs , which over the years , ive despised. Although april keeps on telling me im lucky to have thunder thighs. Whatever that meant...

My light brown , hazel eyes and my cute button nose. Finally my dreadful scars. Ones i tried to save , ones that stayed and ones that never left. They were once purple , white , red...They lined my skin in various ways. Ways i always try to hide from the world. Its molds into my skin , showcasing some fucked up art. Not the type billions of people would watch , the type where as they'd stare and wonder "what could've possibly driven such a sweet girl to that lengths". They were hidden from the world . My eyes hollow and lifeless , my cheeks puffed up making me look like a puff up fish . Dark circles evident under my eyes , evidence from the torturous nights of no sleep. I'll thank insomnia for that , im not big on introductions but welcome to the-

A loud bang against the bathroom door has me almost jolting up in my place and ruins my dramatic introduction.

I brace my hands on the counter infront of me as i exhale a deep breath , already knowing who interrupted me. This family is small enough to recognize each one of their knocks. The idiot starts struggling to open the door , due to me locking it obviously , cross privacy off my list of "things i have to myself".

"Come on stel , ive gotta take a shit and you're clogging the damn bathroom. Stop grooming yourself before i shit my pants!" Ladies and disappointments, meet rahul romano , my brother. We share DNA , but we couldn't be more different. I take my time on brushing my teeth , using the last bit of strenght i have , brushing it slowly just to get a rise out of him. Finally i decide to rinse my mouth , make sure i look atleast presentable to go to school.

Trust me if i could walk into that hellhole with nothing but a tshirt and sweatpants , i would. But how does mom say "A lady should always be modest. Her biggest weapon is her appearance" like this was still the fucking 1900s.

Do i listen to mom? Hell no. Will i be looking like shit once again? Hell yes!

Oh who am i kidding i always look like shit. Baggy sweatpants and baggy hoodie , a bit of lipgloss and mascara so mom doesn't rip her hair from her roots. I pop my lips creating a dramatic effect . I walk to the door , turning it , just to be shoved out the bathroom and into the hallway.

I almost let out a hiss of pain as my arms rub against the rough fabric.

I glare and grind my teeth so hard i hear a crack "If you fucking touch me again , ill take out your eyeballs when you sleep and use them as new earings". My nostrils flare making sure he knows im not kidding in the slightest bit.

His blonde hair sits perfectly on his head. Despite the fact that i know he hasn't washed it in days. How lucky...

Blue eyes bore into me as his pupils expand at my threat, button nose like mine and huge 6'3 height. The door slams into my face just an inch away from the tip of my nose . I bite the inside of my cheek as i breathe in and out. I'll just add hair remover to his shampoo later.

I try my best at walking towards my room but my sweatpants and hoodie rubs on my wounds causing irritation. I wouldn't be suprised if i took off all my clothes right now and saw infections.

Not to mention its fucking hard not to smash all of the smiling pictures looking at me to the ground.

I walk past my older sister Ashley romano's old room. I make a move to walk , but something in me refuses to. Its been months since I've been in here. Besides. Its not like she was coming back .I push it open. Her room smells exactly like i remember. Nothing is out of place. Her cheerleading trophies stand full and proud. Im surprised she didn't take em with her. Pictures of all her friends from freshmen hair until senior year. Reminding me what kind of loser i actually am.