path of redemption

chapter thirty-nine.

-Zaid gonzales.

Growing up , my mama or known as "she who shall not be named" always told me . My virtuousness would be my downfall and my upbringing. It wasn't until i was the age of 6 that i understood what she meant. I remember my mama and papa bringing people over. They reeked of beer and other unknown substances. Mama would want me present in the room whilst i hid lia from the world upstairs in the cupboard. She was okay. Always. Her bunny show she always loved kept her company. Sometimes i would ask mama "who are these people?' Being the naive younger me thought they were good people. She would slap me upside the head while she told me to go "fetch a beer" . Being complaint i always did what she said . And papa sat back and chuckled as he rubbed his disgusting belly. Call me stupid for feeling proud when mama patted my head after giving her a beer.
But some part of me knew. It wasn't my fault. I was six. My brain was developing to the things that was happening around me. The fucked up things. The friends that they had ordered me around and used my small body as if i was some slave to them. They were sometimes oblivious to my presence. All except for one. I can still smell his alcohol breath that makes my stomach churn and his rough hands that manhandled me. His attention always snapped to me . And a disgusting smug grin took over his face. As he molested my body with his dark eyes. Stopping right at my sacred part. I would always find it silly that he'd always look at me. And it my six year old mind , my thoughts immediately jumbled up into a source . The source being "maybe he just wants to be my friend"

His crooked teeth , bald head and huge frame. I knew my facts at the age of 6. Yellow eyes meant he had been snuggling drugs into his body like doctors do , to sedate patients. Except this time it wasn't for anything good.

None of them dared to go up to the rooms . It was always to the bathroom and and back. Call it sixth sense but i felt it. I felt it deep in my frail bones that something would happen that day. I was doing the usual. While mama and papa and their friends sat infront of a tv with beer everywhere and in their hands. Some white substance that i found out by the help of google was cocaine. Sometimes in was empty needles they injected into their bloodstream. Papa would catch me looking at it from time to time and always asked me if i wanted to take a hit.

I declined obviously. I kept an eye on all of them. Making sure they never leave my sight and go up to any of the rooms. It was for my own sanity and lias. It wasn't until i heard mama tell papa in hushed words. But being so close to them and going unnoticed made me heard every single word .
"Richards taking long hm?" My papa brushed her off and said "he's probably taking a shit upstairs in the bathroom" that made my ears perk up . And i stood up without hesitation as i grabbed one of the needles mama and papa always leave around. I ran up the stairs in my small legs and when i ran to the bathroom. I was panting. My blood ran cold. The bathroom was empty. Door creaked open with the tap leaking second by second. I slowly turned to my room in slow steps as i soon heard the sounds of the show lia always watched. I let out a breath of relief as i turned around.

A whimper stopped me in my tracks. And i was coming up with all the worse case scenarios . I ran to my door and pushed it open. The sight infront of me would haunt me forever. In my dreams and out of it. The phone i handed to lia layed on the floor as the sounds of the show filled my ear drums. My cupboard was wrecked like someone punched through it. It all happened so slow. My lia. My baby sister. She was fucking 3.
Her tiny dress was bunched up at her waist as his disgusting hand cupped her through her underwear. Her legs kicking back and forth. Her pigtails loose as he held his other huge hand across her mouth stopping every cry for help. I wanted to fucking kill him. I wanted blood. I craved for it. I was six . And the first thought that ran through my mind was retribution. It seemed like i was stuck in a trance as my little sisters once blue eyes filled with tears. He chuckled at her whimpers and i saw the buldge in his pants grow big with every fight she made. It all happened so fast. The next i was standing at the door and the next i ran to him and jammed the needle into his neck and pushed down. Every cell in my body was on fire. The man stiffened and slowly turned to me . The once smirk he held was no longer as i watched him push me out of the way and fall to his knees.