𝑯𝒊𝒔 𝑶𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝑵𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝑫𝒐𝒐𝒓 | 𝑶𝒃𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅: 𝑩𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝑰

-17-

Amelia set me on the couch and I could sense a bit of panic and concern that I could almost smile with enthusiasm.

"What happened?"

You get distracted so easily. I love that trait about you.

"I-I got jumped walking back from the lake. It all happened so fast." I exhaled heavily and I'm sure I went too far with my self inflicted injuries.

"M-maybe you should call the police for an ambulance."

I smile. "No, I'll be fine. I, ah-

"Don't move, I-I'll get you a first aid kit from your bathroom."

And possibly see the two pairs of panties that I have on my desk? I think not.

I grabbed her by the wrist, stopping her from her task. How would she know if I have one anyways? Unless it's an excuse for something.

"I don't...own one."

She gapes. "Really?"

"Well...I'm not much of a trouble maker." I grin lightly.

"Well what do you want me to do?"

I close my eyes. "Stay here." My thumb brushed against her wrist and even if I was supposed to be misleasing her in many ways, I really don't want her to go.

I miss her, I want her, I-

"I need you." My voice was barely above a whisper and I felt my face get soak with the few tears that escaped under my eyelids.

It's been years since I found someone to love me again. And I don't want her to go. Not again, not ever.

"Please stay."

"I...I can't, I have work to get to." There it is again, that quiver, the weariness in her voice.

Why is she being like this? So standoffish and closed off? I thought she believed me.

I open my eyes, sending her that puppy dog look, pleading with my eyes.

"Did you really not feel anything that night? That spark between us?" I ask softly. Her brown eyes are filled with caution, like she was carefully fishing for her words to avoid offending me.

I sat up, pulling her close to me. "Amelia."

"I can't." Her eyes got glassy and seeing made me pull away. I got up swiftly and she quickly stepped back. I walked past her, my shoulder faintly bumping into hers.

I made my way to the front door which is not far away and opened it with my head held high.

She doesn't love me. She's terrified of me.

Amelia stepped in front of me and sent me gaze. I didn't look at her.

Then her sucular voice radiated through my ears in a silent echo. "I'm sorry Eddy...but you scare me." I gave her a look and she's handing me my glasses.

And matching her tone I answered, "Those aren't mine." I swallowed the lump in my throat and kept myself from crying.

Amelia opened the glasses and placed them over my nose carefully.

She's smart, too smart.

"Stay away from me Eddy."

She walked out and I slammed the door, locking it. I took my glasses off and went straight to my room. I toss them to my bed and stripped out of my clothes.

I'm huffing with anger and heartbreak. My tears blurred my vision and I went over to my bathroom. The hot water cascaded in the tub.

I got in, the hot water feeling like pellets to my skin. I held my head down and kept my eyes closed as her words burned my ears like I've been cursed.

Scare her? I scare her?

I chortle. "I care, Amelia. I care!" My knuckles met the wall again and the more I thought of her the worse things got.

Then the thought of Theo fucking her instead of me clouded my judgement.

"Fuck!" I punched the wall of the shower over and over and over, thinking it to be his face. I was enraged.

Finally I stop. I huff and focused more on my broken knuckles other than her. I tore the band-aid from my face and took in a breath of air as I raised my head to the shower.

The water is lukewarm now. The water hit my face with hard thumps and I enjoyed it.

Calm down Eddy.

I turn the faucet off and got out. I gave myself a look in the mirror and I was shocked by the look on my face.

Him, the me I was as a kid is resurfacing.

I know the difference, I know the exact difference. I closed my eyes and rubbed my eyes. I occupied myself for the next thirty minutes taking care of my wounds and cleaning up behind myself.

I got dressed and grabbed my glasses, resetting them on my face. I took a seat on the chair at my desk and prop my journal open to a clean page.

The pilot pen is pressed between my fingers and the tip of the pen began to move along with my thoughts.

𝐼 𝑑𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝐼'𝑣𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑜𝑏𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒; 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑓𝑎𝑐𝑒𝑑. 𝑀𝑦 𝑛𝑒𝑤𝑒𝑠𝑡 𝑜𝑏𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ, 𝑖𝑠 𝑎 𝑔𝑖𝑟𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑠 𝑟𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑑𝑜𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒.

𝐻𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑒𝑦𝑒𝑠 𝑏𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑚𝑒 𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑐𝑒. 𝐹𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒, 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑑𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑐𝑜𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑒 𝑜𝑛 𝑎 𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑦 𝑑𝑎𝑦. 𝐻𝑒𝑟 ℎ𝑎𝑖𝑟 𝑖𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑓𝑡, 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑠𝑖𝑙𝑘 𝑓𝑎𝑏𝑟𝑖𝑐. 𝐴 𝑡𝑎𝑖𝑙𝑜𝑟𝑠 𝑎𝑏𝑠𝑜𝑙𝑢𝑡𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑣𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒. 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑖𝑟𝑡ℎ𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑟𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑛 𝑎𝑑𝑑𝑠 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑓𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑒𝑠.

𝑊𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑑𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒, 𝑤𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑓𝑖𝑟𝑠𝑡 𝑘𝑖𝑠𝑠, 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑜𝑟 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑟𝑒𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑔𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑒. 𝐻𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟...𝑚𝑦 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒, 𝑠ℎ𝑒'𝑠 𝑎𝑓𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑒.

𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦, 𝐼 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑟𝑖𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑐𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑚𝑠, 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑜. 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡'𝑠 𝑠𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒𝑑, 𝐼'𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑓 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑔𝑢𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐴𝑚𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑎...

You'll have no choice but to love me.

I closed the book and took my glasses off, setting it atop of my book. My eyes went to her panties and I smile, picking one up.

I brought it my nose, inhaling sharply. Her scent is still here, lingering like the after smell of a burning candle. It smells dashing.

I can't stay mad at you. Couples fight all the time, and I did scare you so I'll give you that.

I got up from my seat, tossing the panty on my desk, wathcing it land on my book and over my glasses.

I'll make it up to you. "I promise."

~