come back to me

finally

Mayas pov

I put my finger to my lips, signaling to my mother to be quiet when she comes in. Carina is fast asleep, and so is the baby: finally. We still haven't decided his name, but Carina needed to rest.

I gently pass him over to my mother, tears slide down her face. "Oh, Maya. He's perfect." She says, rocking back and forth. "He looks just like Andrew." I say, smiling. It's true. You can already tell he's going to look just like his zio.

After a few minutes, Jo comes in to take the baby for a few tests. He unfortunately woke up, which then woke up Carina. "Carina, he's perfect." My mother says, walking over to her.

"Do you need anything?" Katherine adds, "just some sleep, honestly." Carina replies. "I'll head out, Drea is waiting for me in daycare. Text me if you need anything, and when you're planning on coming home." She says.

She gives carina a light hug, before giving me one too. "I'm so proud of you." She whispers in my ear.

As I'm laying with carina, I find myself deep in thought. It's weird how different my relationship with my mother has become, especially since I became a mom. Ever since she left my father, she's been around a lot more. I'm seeing a different side of her; a side I wish I had when I was a kid.

I can't hate her, she's my mom. I just can't shake the resentment I feel towards her for the love she never showed me. I know she couldn't, not in that house. But I deserved to be loved. I was just a kid.

"You're thinking too loud." Carina says, shifting in the bed. "I'm sorry." I say, moving my hands to lightly massage her shoulders. Her whole body is tense. "Bella we need to decide on his name" she says, yawning. We have it down to two. I like both, truly. I know carina is leaning towards one.

We finally decide, and she falls back asleep. I told some of her friends to come visit when she wakes up, I know they want to see him, but carina needs to sleep. 16 hours of labor will do that to someone.

Jo brings the bambino back, placing him lightly in my arms. It doesn't take long for the both of them to be snoring in my arms.

After an hour or so, the bambino wakes up hungry, which means I have to wake carina up. Watching her feed him is so magical. I'm in awe of her body. After he's done eating, he falls asleep in her arms.

"Babe the station wants to know when a good time to visit is." I say, running my fingers through her hair. "Send them up, but only 2 at a time." She replies. When Drea was born, we had them all in here at once. Carina was so overwhelmed, reasonably.

Andy and Ben make there way in, cleaning there hands before taking turns holding him. "He's so beautiful, congratulations you guys." Andy says, "does he have a name?" She adds, looking up at us.

I smile at carina, and nod for her to speak. "Giovanni" she says. I kiss her shoulder, before resting my head on it. "He's perfect, and so is the name." Ben says, swaying back and forth with gio in his arms.

After the station takes turns coming in and seeing the baby, Carina and I are finally left alone again. "Do you need anything?" I ask carina, who's feeding gio again. "A massage, please Bella" she says, smiling.

I start down at her feet, moving up her legs to her hips, and then her arms, her shoulders, and her neck. "You're amazing." I whisper to her, "Grazie Bambina" she replies blushing. "Maya get some sleep, we'll be okay. You're exhausted." Carina says. "I really am" I reply, before cuddling into her body on the bed. She places a kiss on my forehead.

I wake up to Gio crying, I get out of the bed slowly hoping to not wake Carina up. I gently lift him out of the bassinet, and he stops crying. Holding him in my arms is a feeling everyone should have.

He's my kid, I want to protect him from all the evil in the world. I want to hold him and tell him everything's going to be okay. I want everything for him that Carina and I didn't get. I promised myself when Drea was born to be the opposite of my parents, and with Gio it's the same.

He's fast asleep in my arms, his little hands gripping my shirt. I hear sniffling behind me, I turn around and see Carina crying. "Bambina what's wrong?" I ask.

"Nothing. It's the opposite of wrong. Maya, you are an amazing mother." She whispers back. "I love you, and I love our kids. They're perfect, you're perfect." I reply. Carina moves over in the bed, giving me room to lay next to her with Gio in my arms. He stirs a little, reaching one hand out to Carina and grabbing onto her arm.

Tears well in my eyes. I never saw myself here, I never saw myself as a parent. I never saw myself in a loving relationship with the most beautiful woman. I never thought I'd live past 20. Thinking about how far I've come... how far we've come, it's beautiful.

"Thank you." I whisper to Carina. "For what?" She replies. "For everything." I answer, placing a  light kiss on her cheek.