THE FATE

CHAPTER 5

I was not quite prepared for this mess night. As much as I could try to calm myself down, it was not working. I don't know how else I could overcome these fears unless I just faced them. But I was so scared to face the fears. Couple years ago when I was first appointed Supreme Commander, I never thought I'd get the opportunities to fight in battles like I have. When you're at war, it is simple. I don't have to face different officers or be political with our stakeholders. Even worse, face Snoke himself. When I hold my light saber and blaster, I have an objective in my mind. The objective being to eliminate the enemy. 

Now my objective tonight was to mingle with my troopers and be vulnerable. If I think of tonight like an objective, I will hopefully be able to get through the night. Just a simple objective right? 

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I reached out to Kor to see if he had already arrived in the dinning hall. But it was radio silence again. All I could think was, 'did I upset him again?'

My quarters were a mess from trying to find specific jewelry that would match my outfit. I stepped around the pile of clothes I yanked off the hangers to get to my dresser to look for a clutch. I found an all black clutch and I held it up to my outfit to look into the mirror to see if it would fit well. 

I looked over my shoulder and I saw my lightsaber resting on the dresser. The shiny black hilt with running sliver lines over the grooves of the handles was glistening from the overhead lights in my room. My lightsaber had not be ignited since Anoat. It has been laid to rest, much like I have been since that unfortunate day. I felt the desire to grab the hilt and just reflect on the memories I have. 

I have memories of clipping the hilt to my thigh for the pointless meetings with command deck, wanting to just ignite it and rip apart the stack of pointless papers that scattered the tables. It brought me back to the many battles Kor and I faced together. Hearing the clash of the blaster fire bounce off and return back to its sender. Then I also remember the many hours that Kylo and I spent training together.  I wasn't quite sure I wanted to reflect on that part of the memory as it did not appear to be a good memory. 

I then hearing the hissing of my door open and I flipped the switch on my hilt to ignite the flame. I could not feel or hear anyone through the force. I listened for any breaths or hearts beating, but all there was just silence.  

The silence would of been at my advantage if I could of hear or felt something or someone, but again it was pure silence. I stepped out of my room and began looking around my living room to see any signs of life that may have triggered the door. 

"Lex."

A familiar voice came out from behind me. 

I turned around and said to the unknown figure, "what the actual fuck Kylo, I was about to slice you in half." 

"We need to talk." he said abruptly. 

"No, I don't care right now." I snapped back and put my lightsaber in my clutch and grabbed my high heels. 

I began going into the bathroom to apply the last layer of lipstick and chuck it into my clutch. I fluffed my hair a bit in the mirror and gave myself one last look before heading out the door. 

"You look beautiful," Kylo said to me. 

"I don't have time for your games right now." I huffed as I walked past him. 

He reached out and grabbed me by the arm. I couldn't help but be more annoyed than I was prior. I was already running behind and him standing in my way didn't help at all.