Twilight: Red Rain

The Trial of The Millennia

The day of the trial soon arrived, and when we got to Aro's American home for the occasion, we saw people from various vampire news outlets there, as this was the first time a human had filed in vampire court, and so, of course, it would have a huge media storm surrounding it, and when we entered, Aro was sitting at the judge's podium, dressed like a seventeenth century judge, of course, acting as judge, like he always does (he does so so that he can rig the trials in his favor), Renata was the Bailiff, Caius was the prosecutor, my acquaintance Tanya was the stenographer, and the jury was comprised of 12 other vampires that I had never met before, who all had notebooks in which to write. 

Anyway, before we entered, I asked Jacob "Are you sure you can do this," Jacob then said "Of course. Now, I've never been to law school, but I DID watch Better Call Saul at my barbershop last night. The sound wasn't on, and the subtitles were all in Japanese, but I think I got the gist" Then, now with a bit more nervousness, we entered the courtroom, and met with Charlie again, who, once we were seated, said, "I'll drop the charges if you two split up, this is your last chance". At this point, Bella felt it necessary to stick up for me, saying "DAD! You know that's still blackmail. and besides, Edward's already countersued you, and since this is vampire court, the loser of this case will have to pay their credit limit in fines" Charlie, not taking too kindly to this, then said "Oh, when I get a hold of you I'm gonna-" but just before he could say that he would string me to his ceiling and use me as a disco ball, Aro rapped his gavel 3 times and said "Order in the court!" the room went quiet before Aro said "Renata, read the accusations" with that, the heralds blew three blasts on their trumpets, and Renata said "as you wish", then she put on her reading glasses, cleared her throat, and read the following charges out loud:

Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today because Plaintiff Charles Swan accuses the defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr. of harboring secret desires of harming, feeding upon, and converting Plaintiff Charles Swan's daughter Isabella Marie Swan, in violation of a vast majority of our relationship laws and feeding codes, and in addition, the Plaintiff Charles Swan accuses the defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr. of stalking, pedophilia, possession of pornography, and the careless endangerment of the Plaintiff Charles Swan's daughter Isabella Marie Swan on multiple different occasions. By contrast, the defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr. countersues for falsifying all accusations made against him as seen above for personal benefit, breaking, and the attempted murder of himself and two others with an ancient artifact, who are also present in this courtroom as the Defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr.'s legal defense team

After those incredibly long-winded charges, Aro said "Plaintiff Charles Swan, you may begin the persecution" "Thank you, Aro" said Charlie, before he said, "Your honor, I call as my first witnesses, Laura Mallory, and Jessica Stanley" At this word, Charlie's witnesses went up to the witness box, and then, Caius said "so, what do the two of you know about this whole affair?" "Well," said Jessica "we knew he seemed attracted to her by something we couldn't pin down, but, since Charlie spilled the beans, we know it was the scent of her blood, which is creepy AF" "Is it also true," said Caius in an interrogative tone "that you had the defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr locked in his own home because he threatened to get with Miss Swan" there was a pause before Caius said, "DID YOU, OR DID YOU NOT HAVE HIM LOCKED UP!?" "we did" said Jessica "That is all, thank you!" said Caius, and they left, Aro then said "THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT!" to Renata, before becoming calm again and saying "jury, write that down" and then, after the jury wrote that down, he said "next witness" and Charlie called "Mike Newton" to the stands, and then, Caius said "well, what have you to say about this" Mike said "well, all I know is that him trying to leave her led to her for whatever reason doing a bunch of dangerous stuff, including wiping out on a motorcycle and jumping off a cliff" "and" said Caius "due to this relationship, you cut off the defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr.'s allowance" "well, yeah I-" said Mike, but then Caius said "then he was, to the best of your knowledge, without funds" Mike again said "well, yeah I-" before Caius said "That is all, thank you!" and Mike left the court as soon as he was excused, before Aro whispered to Renata "that's the most important piece of evidence we've heard yet...WRITE THAT DOWN!" and then the jury wrote that down, before Aro rapped his gavel again and said "now, the counsel for the defense may begin to plead defendant Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Jr's case" 

With that, Jacob rose to his feet, having just finished the refreshments that he had been given when the trial began, and said "your honor, with the court's indulgence, we rise prepared to plead our client's defense, and with that, we call to the stands...EMMETT CULLEN AND JASPER HALE-CULLEN!" at this, Jasper and Emmett came into the witness box, and pulled out a piece of parchment, with Emmett saying "what I have here in my hands is a treaty made between the Cullens, and the Quileute werewolves, the pack that Jacob is from, back in 1978, and it says here, in section B, subsection F, sub-subsection F, sub-sub-subsection S, paragraph 17, in the 'Terms of Tranquility' clause, that: "under no circumstances shall the Quileute werewolves antagonize the Cullens, and likewise the other way around, unless the Cullens have fed on the blood of a human willingly, in which case, this treaty would be rendered null and void, which does not apply if the human wished to be turned" "bearing this in mind, you start to see the problems with the plaintiff's accusations, as this treaty is not something any of us wish to break, or, for that matter, are even able to break, as all involved sealed it with a blood pact, thus proving our point" Aro said "you make a fantastic point!" clearly impressed, Charlie, however, said "yeah, legal documents may be binding, but just because this one says you can't hurt humans doesn't mean that Edwin still doesn't want to bite Bella" "well" said Jacob, "tell that to Bella herself" and Bella then went up to the witness box, and at this, Charlie said "okay guys, really?! this is your stupidest idea ever. I mean, Bella's my daughter, so would you really expect her to testify against me!" "Well," said Bella, "prepare to be blown away" then, she placed a briefcase on the stand at the witness box, and, after putting in the combination of '007' (after my second favorite movie character), opened the case, to reveal my diary, before she flipped to page 117 (the page I wrote up after I first told her the truth about me), and read the page out loud, it went as follows: "I wouldn't even think of hurting her like that, no matter what anyone else says, and it isn't just because of the treaty, I genuinely love her, and I always will" after that, Aro said "this evidence is damming, now, I shall allow for a recess while I make my final decision" after Aro, Renata, Caius, and the jury went back to make their decision, Charlie said "okay, since I it's all but guaranteed that I'm going to lose at this point, I might as well get this in now" then, he took Bella's pepper spray from her pocket, and sprayed me, but nothing happened, he was at first confused, but then I clarified "vampires are immune to pepper spray for whatever reason"

"ladies and gentlemen, I have reached a verdict, I find in favor of the defendant" After he said that, Charlie said "Okay, I'll pay the fine" and he did, but then, an ankle bracelet was fitted to him, with Aro saying "this bracelet is here to ensure you do not break any of our laws again, for if you do, the book will be thrown at you" Charlie then asked "Aro, is that completely necessary?" to which Aro replied "Yes. Vampire Law #4242 states that if a vampire is in a relationship with anybody, vampire or otherwise, then the parent or guardian of either party cannot break said relationship off under any circumstances whatsoever. It may seem insane to you, but it is an example of what must be done to keep our species alive"