Fifty Shades of EraserMic (Shades of EraserMic #1)

A Few Silent Moments

Hizashi was a bold man. He was confident, boisterous, perky, a babbler, open and kind; all the things a social butterfly would need to truly flourish. He had always been that way; had gone through a bit of his awkward stage at that thirteen-year mark but by the time he enrolled and attended U.A? Oh, he had been brimming with those personality factors; he couldn't be shut up, he was popular with the girls in his class.

And even though his voice took a while to break he still happily shouted when he waltzed into the classroom which had never failed to make Shouta cringe. He was a loud, bold person and there was no changing that about him. Of course, just because he was a bold and loud person, perky and boisterous, it didn't mean he couldn't get embarrassed and it didn't mean he couldn't be shy. In fact, despite his loud mouth he had to admit even to himself that in those tentative early years of their friendship that he had been very shy around Shouta.

He tried going through his life with his mothers' helpful tips, little tidbits of advice and tried not to care what others thought about him. Tried. But the second he offered a friendship with Shouta, the minute Oboro tied them together, he found that he cared about how he came across to Shouta. He cared what the black-haired teen thought of him back then. He still did. It had taken many slip ups for him to realize that while, yes, he was annoying to his husband in their youth that Shouta still did care about him in some way.

Enough to keep him around and to put effort into friendship. Strange how the minute Oboro died, how they dealt with that fall out, that he tried so hard to put the effort into their new relationship and how Shouta had just given up. How it flip flopped the second they scraped out of high school; how HE didn't care anymore and Shouta seemed to clutch at their relationship with a strangle hold.

Of course, once he got his shit together, he tried to piece himself back together into that bright, boisterous and perk person he'd been. He tried too at least. It wasn't as easy as going back into his old personality but rather his mind, his personality, changed with the way life was just ripping him from one side to the other. And he found he liked who he was when he came out of that. When he was pieced together to find his husband still there by his side, waiting for him to get his shit together.

Waiting for him to understand he wasn't the only one going through Hell in those years. And so, he became bright. He started talking animatedly again, he crooned and fawned over little things, he threw himself back into their relationship once they reevaluated and got back together in college. He put everything into himself, into them, and into his friendships he thought he'd ripped apart. He was grateful he kicked himself in the ass to do it, had Nemuri and Shouta slamming their own feet into his ass to get him sober.

He may not be perfect but he was himself and that's all he could be thankful for. He was unashamedly loud, unashamedly perky, and a babbler; a true social butterfly who wasn't afraid to curl in on himself if need be or to encourage others to be just as bright, just as loud and social with others. It was perhaps why he was able to do the things he could do; his boldness, his confidence, really helped him in going into things with an open mind, a willingness to try, and the patience required for it.

That's why when three days of Shouta needing his break turned into a week, he didn't blink an eye. He didn't care because he got to squeeze, cuddle, spoon and twist up with his husband happily whenever they possibly had the chance. He doted and fawned over the man, showering him with his 'flowery' words as the man called it but Shouta didn't once push him away. He truly didn't care about the sex at that time; he wanted Shouta happy, content, and he wanted him relaxed.

He wanted him to have time to breathe. Not every relationship or marriage needed to be filled with sex; it didn't need to burn or sizzle with heat when they were alone, but rather it could be filled with warmth that had his chest aching as he squeezed Shouta to his chest when they laid together. He was happy, he was absolutely delighted, and he was overjoyed he got to kiss, nuzzle and squeeze his husband like he was nothing more than a true, overgrown kitten.