Fifty Shades of EraserMic (Shades of EraserMic #1)

Mean As A Viper

Aching knees.

The chill that attacked his skin mercilessly.

The backs of his thighs burning.

Shouta liked to believe he always knew when he had bitten off more than he could chew; that he wouldn't push the boundaries again after that horrible mistake with the choking, his strange grief over the cock cage, and the handcuffs. Swore that he wouldn't rush headfirst into something he didn't understand. That he wouldn't just dive in and demand that they do something they'd never truly done before.

He wouldn't even toe the line that was a possible mistake that would lead to Hizashi calling off the challenge even if the blonde assured him again and again that it wouldn't. But he didn't want to risk it. People have gone back on their word before and Hizashi was no different. Which is why, when he was looking over their dwindling, short list his eyes landed on two words that glowed up at him like many other kinks thus far.

Erotic humiliation. While the words were certainly familiar, tickled something faint in the back of his mind, he had decided that Google would hold an answer that he wanted. And damn if he didn't find the answer. He was thrown down a rabbit hole that seemed to have no end; a hole that had layers and layers. All being ripped back one by one to send him spiraling. Leaving him far curiouser than he had been before.

And so he looked up those two little words. And he was so completely, utterly grateful he had. While there were many things, they had done so far that would make heads tilt and eyes squint, erotic humiliation seemed to be one of the easier ones he could live with. One of the ones he could swallow with a grain of salt like he had with the degradation. He had dived into article after article eager.

Fell down so many rabbit holes. So many that he found himself pacing the kitchen with his phone glowing at him as he gnawed at his fingers nails while he read each article he possibly could and viewed Reddit threads he should have stayed away from. It made his heart pound, made his stomach clench and knot fiercely with that airy drop that would hit him on repeat. Again and again in waves that were fed by his racing heart.

It lead him to read one thing after another when he could. Even contacted the professional that Hizashi had been talking too on and off since the choking incident and he was surprised by just how kind this woman had been when she helped him navigate the world that was erotic humiliation. Helped him to understand it as well as he possibly could. It took about two additional meetings with this professional.

Together they made up a bullet point list to bring up to the blonde that he felt confident going to the man and presenting what he wanted to do next off of the list. Oh, it was adorable the splotches of pink that came to his husband's cheeks with the widening of eyes that sparkled with a curious confusion. Together, the blonde happily listened to him as he told him exactly what it was.

Words that he'd practiced and rehearsed for that exact moment. Showed him the pages he had bookmarked on his laptop, and what the professional had told him the best he could, yet he stumbled over his words when those wide eyes flicked to him. Slowly, that confused look disappeared. In its place was temptation. Interest. After Hizashi seemed to understand and after he also emailed the professional sex therapist himself.

After some back and forth, the blonde came back to him with a determined look to his face. A confident sparkle in his eye. Then, just like with the café, just like with the forced orgasms, and wrote out everything they would want to include with it. Just what they wanted to get into with the kink which they then ran by the therapist who talked them through a few things. Such as how to approach multiple parts of it.

What it would entail, how to have that open and clear communication between them until they were rather confident they could do it. He was far too excited for something that would possibly be the most demeaning thing he'd live through in his entire life. But his curiosity, his ugly little curiosity, was far too present for him to consider backing out right away. They then agreed on immersion being the key to it.