Last Straw

Cross Roads

The whole plane ride from London back to New York, he sleeps.

I'm tempted to go lay next to him and kiss him a million times on the flight. To hold him close like we used to. I want more. I want to climb on top of him and straddle him, to tug my hands through his hair and bring him close. I'm dying to feel him between my thighs, the warmth of his hands against my hips. One kiss wouldn't be enough because I want him so much I couldn't possibly stop without devouring every inch of him.

What would he say if I reached out and touched him?

What would he say if I crawled onto him and had my way will him?

Would he stop me? Would he want me just as bad as I'm aching for him?

Things between us are at such a cross roads.

There's no chance to find out because I'm not brave enough to wake him, so he sleeps the entire way. From the airport we have to take separate cars because I'm straight from wheels down to a meeting with a my agent and publisher, so he's headed for my apartment to take some zoom meetings in peace.

Just like that, we're apart again.

Part of me is annoyed even though I know it's illogical but after how tense things have been between us I was hoping we'd have a chance to talk some of it out.

Like always, we had no chance.

Riding across the bridge into the city I lived in for so long now feels strangely nostalgic. Like coming to a place that used to be home but now it feels like a coat that doesn't fit anymore.

Still, the second I step out of the car for my meeting I remember the energy that made me fall in love with the city in the first place. There's so many people crammed in such a small space it's away a hustle and bustle on every corner, every hour here.

It's both wonderful and horrible at the same time.

If I don't fit here anymore, where will I go when the season ends? There's always Italy where Elsa and Amelia will be. Or maybe London with Carmen and Ally? Or maybe somewhere new alone?

Maybe somewhere with him.

At this point anything, anywhere is possible.

There's no time to think about it now because the moment the lift doors open my agent Lauren is ready and waiting. Damn, this one must be good because I haven't had the white glove, board room meeting with all the men present since the first one. Back then they had been foaming at the mouth right up until I mentioned the alias.

In the end I won.

Today with the click of Lauren's tall heel's on the cement floor it feels like another win is in the air for us. Thank fuck! I've been rolling with the punches for months now it well past due time something changed in my luck. Lauren is a short little thing of a woman, barely even five foot tall so thin she doesn't look a day over sixteen despite being twice it. Small in stature she makes up for it with her bull dog attitude. She doesn't take shit from anyone, even the men in her company, and neither do her clients. The woman lives in high heels and power suits, today being no exception. "You too, you look as stunning as always. We have the suits today?" I reply to Lauren about her morning greeting with a side of well wishes.