Nathan And Jess

Chapter 03: A Change of Plans

After a long and quiet breakfast I find myself pacing back and forth in my room. my right index on my chin, staring straight at the floor as my mind struggled to formulate a possible way out of this mess.

Initially I had planned to Gather enough money and run away before being used as a chess piece into marriage, settling down in the country side and spending the remainder of my life peacefully but that option was sabotaged. Now I know after setting the marriage everything will fly past and the Earnhardts will no doubt choose the earliest date for marriage.

What can I do?
what should I do? I can't be sacrificed as a stepping stone for the love interests.
*Ding*.
I snap. that's it!!
That's it!
Yes!
If my memory serves me right the male lead has already met and fallen for the female lead. He would hate me for taking the privilege of him marrying the person he loves and adding to the fuel I'm a lady from the house he loathes more than anything.
I can use that to my advantage!.
I can set up a contract with him. If I offer back his freedom and promise his marriage to the Female lead Eva de Vere in exchange for my freedom and peace he wouldn't be able to refuse. it's just a delay of my original plan.
I nod to myself satisfied with my plan. now I just need to find the best time to lay this before him and BAM. my freedom awaits.

I see it. So close. Haaah. As I raise my hand to reach out.
But..
As soon as the thought corrupts my mind the freedom in my imagination comes crashing down. I will need to save up enough money to spend the remainder of my pewny existence eating and sleeping so I can enjoy in this life what I couldn't in my previous one.

maybe I can ask the duke for compensation? and when I've gathered enought to modestly support my remaining life I can leave.

that part needs some working but the plan is enough for now. For now I just need to get out of this hell hole ASAP.

The days flew by as I avoided causing trouble and when I feared I couldn't hold back anymore it would seep out into my pillow in the form of punches. I imagine it as the faces  of the as*holes aka Earnhardts. the satisfaction of finally letting it out is beyond belief.

The emperor Arranged a grand ball in celebration of the Northern Duke's victory and heroism on the battlefield, that's when Count Earnhardt is planning to announce the engagement and get me and Nathan acquainted with each other.

Not long after the dresses for the occasion got delivered. Surprisingly yet not so surprisingly my dress was outdated and something unfit for a lady of my age. it was a shade of ashy grey. Something an old lady or a sulking lady would wear. I'm shocked they even sent me something new at all. even if it looks like Rags.

Whilst Sylivia got a bright blue gown with fancy embellishments despite the house facing a crisis.

well. I shrugged, Time to get resourceful. I pull out one of the old dresses from the wardrobe. it's an Emerald fabric with golden embroidery tracing along into a pattern of flowers. It's style is outdated however it could make do with a bit of alterations.

Well good for me I've done sewing before.

one moment I'm trying to work on the dress and the next I'm grabbing my head from the excruciating pain. Memories, they're rushing in but..... they're not mine. The green dress, Ive seen someone wear it.

It's familiar. I see visions of a lady. Her hair it's so blonde it can be mistaken for gold. and I thought the villainess was dead gorgeous.
"Jessica, Mommy's here darling".  she smiles thousand times brighter than the sun. It's beautiful with every meaning of the word.
is she saying that to me?.
it's just us.
No she's Jessica's mom.
The late countess..
The rest of the voices, they're muffled I can't make out what's being said.
I growl in pain as the memories pass in instants. I can't see them properly but I remember.

I remember, And suddenly everything goes silent. The pain is gone and I'm sitting on the floor, dress in hand with ragged breathing. only then do I realised the tears in my eyes. I'm crying? I wipe them away.

No, Its not me. It's her, Jessica. she's still somewhere Inside me. her feelings and memories are mine to carry now. I will cherish them for me, for her, For the both of us.

I whisk my heard around to face the door. Wow, no one even came to check up on me huh?

would they even bother themselves with the funeral if I were to die? Well, it just plays in my favor doesn't it?
I sigh and get done with the alterations as fast as possible. A long while later I pull back and nod, satisfied with my work.
"Hey, I didn't change much of your mother's dress okay?".
I smile at my dumb mumbling, as though she would ever answer back.

I peer out of the window onto the full moon peeking back. no one even bothered to call me over for dinner huh? I have to get out of this wretched place. A new motivation bubbles inside of me.

I pity her, The Villainess'. so I have to live happily for myself and for the sake of the broken soul slumbering within me. Now that I can feel her emotions within myself I feel the pain the dejection, the hate and the exhaustion.

I'll live happily for you Jessica for the sake of the happiness you couldn't achieve but so desperately deserved.

In two days, It's the ball. I'll execute my plan then.
"God please". I pray "Let me be successful just this once. I also deserve some peace do I not?".

Also because I haven't thought of a backup plan yet.
And with time flying by the day of the ball was at our heads.