The next morning I woke up and brushed my teeth and combed my hair not caring what I wear anymore so I wore a whit top with low rise sweat pants and slides with socks. I made my to school entering and making my way to my first class. I sat down and pulled out all my stuff since I needed to copy the notes from yesterday but is was kinda difficult since it was all erased. "U can copy mine if u want" "look tom u said ur self that u went gonna stay with me so mind ur business" "that doesn't mean I can't help u" I took a deep breath in trying not to get angry even though i was already frustrated. "Alr so there's an upcoming project and u all with be paired up in groups of two starting with Kayla and Gina Maddie and Chris James and Carl tom and juju- as soon as he said that everything just went away I couldn't hear anything I just focused on what he just said "juju!" I looked at the professor as he called my name "pay attention please" I nodded as in yes and just continued to work "where should we do the project" "I'll do everything so u don't have to come over." "Well they put us in groups for a reason" "does it look like I give a fuck I'm still gonna do everything" "no I wanna help" the bell rang and I roughly got all my stuff and went outside the classroom into the restroom. I don't know why the simplest things bother me I mean I just wanna do it myself bc I don't wanna be with him and I'm not going to be but whatever I quickly exited and went to my other class. (Time passes) it was lunch and I still just got water since I wasn't really hungry. "Hey" Tom said as he walked up and sat down next to me "how u feeling abt that scar looks like it hurts" "well no shit" "oh so u talk now" "I literally talked to u in the morning what do u want" "I want u to get back with me" "dumbass u the one who said u wasn't gonna stay with me" "yea that's why I want u to forgive me and get with me again" "no I'm not someone u can just have whenever u want then push me away again." "Please juju" "no" he said as he grabbed my wrist but it suddenly it hurt since he grabbed where I cut myself causing me to rub my teeth together as he looked down "juju..again" "just mind ur business and leave me alone tom and I'll do the project" I said before leaving and exiting the school since I didn't care if I got in trouble for skipping I just wanted to get the fuck out of there. I went home early which made lee question why "why r u home early" "cuz I fucking want to" "ok well I asked u why" "gosh can everyone just stop being in my fucking business and shut the fuck up!?" I said as I ran off upstairs into my room slamming the door soon realizing all the mess I did yesterday. I scrambled through my room and laid on my bed until I heard a knock at the main door "lee!" "Bitch u get it!" I sighed and got up going downstairs and passing lee since he was in the couch while I push the back of his forehead while opening the door "what!?" I quickly slammed the door open to just see Tom "no." I said as I was going to slam the door but his foot was in the way "can I at least talk to u" he said as I rolled my eyes and opened the door wide so he can come in. At this point I just wanted to get this over with bc if I am being brutally honest I really don't give a fuck. We went to my room and I closed the door as I soon saw tom with wide eyes and jaw dropped "juju what..the actual fuck happened to ur room!"
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(Btw this jus an inspo of how jujus room looks like ...yea) "I don't wanna talk abt it ok jus tell me already" I said with a sigh "and why is there blood on the carpet!?" "Just shut up!" I said pulling on my hair while looking down already mad again. "Ok fine I came here to check up on u and- "Yea and clearly I'm doing shitty so yea that's how I'm doing goodbye" "juju don't be like this what happened" "nothing! Nothing. Fucking. Happened. Im just..exhausted" "from what" "everything everyone...I just wanna idk not be here anymore" "why" "stop asking so many questions and get out if ur done" "juju I'm trying to help- "just get the fuck out!" I screamed as I rolled into a ball in my bed starting to cry pulling all my hair until my knuckles turned white. While I was crying I was thinking abt how if I would've just put his gun to my head and shot my self. Would the world be a better place? Would anyone even care? Then I started to think what if when I took the Tylenol what would happen if I took the whole bottle? What if I just die? What if I just grabbed a knife and and stab my self in the heart? Laying there now all alone like I always end up I soon was drowning in my own deep thoughts.
