secrets from the lair

you wouldn't know

you keep asking me what's wrong,

but what can i even say to you?

how do i tell you that you're the cause of all of this

so i just shut down,

and refuse to answer

which makes you blame my age

you think that i can't share things with you because i'm trying to be strong,

because i think i'm old enough to handle it alone

because i don't want to bother you

you think the causes of my suffering are average,

when in actuality they're not

you think i'm just over exaggerating things that i should just let go

but that's what you think

you tell me to trust you,

but you're the one who made me lose it

so how can i?

it isn't like you're even trying to earn it back,

and i can't just magically hand it over

and how can you even expect me to?

when all you do is say things i never wanted to hear

and it just shatters my heart that gets stuck in my throat

and man! does that suck