Cold Blooded

...Into Old Habits

They kept going until they eventually came across it. A huge gash in the pristine white landscape loomed before them. Though it was wide and long, it was hard to see until it was right before you. The earth around it puckered up like flesh around a wound and kept it hidden from the distance.

Ajax felt his legs freeze beneath him as his eyes looked down into the depths of the pit. As he looked into the abyss.

All those years ago, when he had fallen in, he hadn't thought that he would ever make it out. He had run away from a boring life and ended up with the adventure he had always dreamed of. When he was so young, he didn't know that a dream could so easily become a nightmare.

When that fourteen year old boy had fallen into the abyss, he had died. The boy that came out of there lived for the chaos of battle and the challenge of the fight, but his youth had died in the three months that he had been down there.

Master had taken care of him down there, but she was always so much stronger. She had taught him how to master any weapon and passed on her Foul Legacy to him. Still, he had never been able to beat her, even as she wielded her blade with only a single hand.

When he had finally made his way out, he had vowed to never return. Yet here he was. There was a shaky bridge strung across the gorge, but Ajax couldn't move his body. He was frozen in this icy stance.

He remembered the first few days after he had found his way back home. He didn't leave his room, much less the house for anything. He was sure that a monster would jump out from the shadows at any moment and that he would need to fight. He always kept a weapon close, be it a broadsword or a kitchen knife. He trapped himself away in a prison of anxiety until he finally broke free.

He left the house, blade in hand, and sought out the one thing he knew. He was looking for a fight. He challenged beast and man alike until his father was done with him and sent him off to be "fixed" by the harsh rules of the fatui. Little had his father known that it would only grant more time to fight and grow stronger. He was soon found by Pulcinella and made his way up the ranks. That was how Tartaglia was born and how Ajax died.

Again, all these years later, he felt the urge to run and fight whatever was closest. Just as long as he never had to do it down there again. He needed to fight something. He needed a challenge. What was near? Was there a bear or a wolf close by? He needed to fight something, just as long as it wasn't something down there. What could he fight?

Chongyun squeezed Ajax's hand and the man focussed on the little boy for a moment. Chongyun. That was the answer. He could fight Chongyun. That'd be a fun challenge. He just needed to find a way to trigger-

Ajax shook his head violently. What was wrong with him? After everything he had already put Chongyun through, how could he even consider that? It was this place, it was messing with his mind. He needed to get out of here.

"Mr. Ajax?" Chongyun looked up at the older man. "It's going to be okay. I'll protect you from the scary things. It's okay to be scared of heights."

"I-" Is that what Chongyun thought it was about? The height? Well, it didn't help, but it was so much more than that. And how could Chongyun protect him of the scary things if Tartaglia was the one that they should all be afraid of. "Why don't you cross the bridge with Saya?"

"Are you sure?" Chongyun's eyes showed their true age at that moment. It didn't matter if he looked no older than six, he still had the experiences that he had been through buried deep inside him.

Ajax took a deep breath and looked into Chongyun's eyes. He gained the bit of strength that he needed and slowly let go of the boy's hand. He nodded for Chongyun to go with Saya. This was something that he needed to do, and it was something that he needed to do on his own.

Chongyun nodded and gave a warm smile before catching up to Saya. The two began to cross the bridge as Ajax took a few deep breaths. As they were almost across the bridge, he shook out his hands and took one last deep breath. He would just have to run straight across. It was like ripping off a bandage, just getting it over with quickly.

"Hah, after all these years you really think you'll be able to cross that now?" Ajax froze again as the voice rang out behind him. He would have known that voice anywhere. The man that he had put too much trust in and told far too much. He didn't realize how much that would end up hurting him until this very moment. He slowly turned around and faced the man behind him.

"Pullcinella," Ajax breathed, wishing with everything in him that this wasn't happening right now.

"Do you remember the night that you told me about this place? You were rather drunk, I will say that." Pulcinella cocked his head to the side and smiled. "You told me all about your time here and your master and how much the helplessness of being trapped down there still haunts you. Sure, you could beat most any beast down there, but the sense of being trapped in there with no escape was what terrified you. Hah, how weak a man becomes after one glass too many."

"I must say... " Pulcinella strode closer, a fleet of soldiers behind him. "I am quite disappointed in you, my boy."

"Don't call me that."

"Oh, come on, now." Pulcinella walked closer, but Ajax couldn't manage a single step away. The old man smiled and continued. "You know that I have always cared for you and your family. You wouldn't want all of you on my bad side now would you, my boy?"

Ajax hesitated, not sure what to do.

"Besides," Pulcinella stood right in front of Ajax now and reached up to grab Ajax's face. He turned the younger man's head to look across the bridge at Chongyun and Saya. "I'm sure there is no way that you would ever consider saving some random monster over yourself and your family. You wouldn't doom your family to a future with the fatui as their enemies, would you, my boy?"

"He is not a monster." Ajax muttered.

"What was that?" A bit of anger seemed to creep its way into Pulcinella's voice.

"I said that," Ajax pulled his head out of Pulcinella's grasp and rose to his full height. He looked down at the small man and set his jaw. "He. Is. Not. A. Monster."

At that moment, something in Ajax snapped and he knew this was just what he needed. A good fight.

~author's note~

Thank you to anyway that had made it this far. I hope you've enjoyed it so far. Please leave a comment and vote if you enjoyed it. And thank you again.

chapter art by @moonlitisles