Cold Blooded

Falling Back...

They walked through the snow and Ajax heard the beating of his heart growing louder in his ears. It felt as if ice were clawing its way up his throat making breathing harder with every step. The wind howled, as if even the very elements were trying to keep them away from that place.

Ajax shivered at the very thought and started rubbing the sides of his arms for warmth. He closed his eyes and began to take slow, measured breaths. His heart was beating louder and faster now.

Had it always been so cold around here? What was that noise? Was someone talking? No, Saya and Chongyun were too far away. Why were they so far? What was happening? What was that? Over there. No, over there. Where was he? What was happening? He couldn't be back here. What was happening?

Ajax ran his fingers through his hair and tried to cover his ears. He shook his head and stumbled a few steps backwards. Someone was calling his name. Master? Are you here?

He tripped over something and began to fall. He was falling. Falling down, down, down. He would be trapped again. He wouldn't be able to make it out this time. He was falling. He was trapped. He was falling.

He hit the cold, unforgiving snow. He shuffled backwards until he hit his back against a tree. He grabbed at his head again and tried to slow his breaths, but his heart was only beating faster and louder. It was getting louder, so loud. WHY WOULDN'T IT STOP? WHY WAS IT SO LOUD?

"Ajax?!" Someone was calling him. They sounded scared. They were worried. Why were they worried? Had he done something wrong? Was someone in danger? What was happening? Why was he here? What was happening? Why was he here? Again?

He was gasping for breath and they were coming out too fast. His heartbeat was too loud. Too fast. Too loud. Too fast. Too loud.

                                                               Too fast.

                                                                                Too loud.

                                                                                                      Too fast.

                                                                                                                                Too loud.

                                                                                                                                                              Too fast.

                                                                                                                                                                                    Too loud.

"Mr. Ajax?" 

A warm hand rested on the man's knee and the heartbeats began to quiet. His gasps slowed to a controllable pace and the world began to shift back into focus. He raised his head and looked into the eyes of the little boy before him.

"It's okay," Chongyun whispered. "I get kinda scared sometimes, too."

 The little boy reached out with his small hands and took Ajax's into his own. He held the hand tight and tilted his head with a big smile. "You just have to remember that you have your friends to keep the scary things away. We'll keep you safe. Even if you get scared sometimes."

Ajax didn't realize he had been shaking until his body stopped. He looked into Chongyun's bright eyes and warm smile. Somehow, the boy warmed the chill running through his bones and brought the strength back to his legs. Behind Chongyun, Saya had bent down to look at Ajax. Her eyes were filled with concern, but also strength. After everything she had been through, she was still going and that meant that Ajax could keep going too.

Taking a deep breath, Ajax rose to his feet. He squeezed Chongyun's hand and looked up at Saya. She stood up and looked back at him. She tilted her head to the side, as if asking if he was okay. He nodded and in that moment he knew that it was true.

He was alright and he could get through this too.