Stuck with a Slytherin

7: "...say you were with me."

You sat in your room, waiting for Kylie to return. Your anxiety managed to get ahold of you during breakfast, but you and Kylie have DADA together first period, so hopefully she can help you survive through that.

You looked around the room, deciding after a few minutes to check your cuts, as they were done with a probably very dirty piece of glass.

You stood up and walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind you so Kylie wouldn't walk in and find out.

As you lifted up your sleeve, you saw blood still welling on your arm.

That's not good, it's been almost an hour. They're normally scabbed over by now.

You turned on the faucet and stuck your arm under the lukewarm water, wincing as it hit the cuts.

"Y/n?" Kylie's voice filtered through the door. "Are you okay?"

You quickly shut off the sink and yanked your sleeve down to cover your arm, then unlocked and opened the door.

"Yeah, why?" You gave her a fake (but hopefully convincing) smile.

"Because you locked yourself in the bathroom, and have had the sink running for 10 minutes." Well I didn't think it was that long but okay. "I wanted to make sure you weren't... ya know, cutting again?"

Ugh, you forgot you told her. Except for an hour ago, you hadn't cut in almost 2 years.

Way to break habits, idiot.

Shut up.

"Y-yeah, no, I wasn't." You lifted up the sleeve of your arm that you didn't cut, just to be convincing.

But she raised an eyebrow when you didn't lift the other. "Um, okay. Well are you feeling up to Defense class?" You nodded, following her out the door.

You left your wand in the room on purpose, so you'd have an excuse to leave the class for a few minutes, if need be.

But when you walked into the class, your breathing hitched, and you froze.

There, sitting in the back corner, was Draco Malfoy, smirking at you. You had forgotten he was in your class.

"Feeling better after your little... episode?" You sat as far from him as possible, which-thankfully-was right next to the door. "I have to say, I was a little disappointed when you walked in. I thought we were all free of you."

Tears sprang to your eyes. He just... no, he couldn't mean... But he did. You knew he did.

You could feel your breathing speed up, your heart pounding in your chest, and seized your opportunity.

You raised your hand. "Professor, I forgot my wand in the dorm. Could I grab it, please?"

And at the professor's nod, you walked towards the door, then sprinted to the Slytherin Commons.

But it had slipped your mind that some of the 7th years had a free period, and were hanging out on the couches.

You got many dirty looks as you slammed the painting behind you and bolted up towards the girls' dorms.

But you heard one voice trail off as you ran away, saying: "What... oh, poor thing, I'll be right back. No, I'm just going to check..."

And you quickly locked the door, falling into your bed, shaking. Your vision was going black. I can't breathe. I can't- I can't breathe. I need something...

Your thoughts quickly drifted to the blade in the back of your bathroom drawer. When you threw them all out 2 years ago, you had forgotten that one, and stumbled across it last year. But for some reason, you couldn't bring yourself to throw it out. And you were grateful, now.

You stood up, extremely dizzy and hyperventilating, and made your way to the bathroom. You dug through the bottom drawer for a few seconds before finding it, holding it to your arm, ready to press in.

"Alohamora." A calm voice filtered through the walls, and your door handle turned. No no no no. Please no.

An older girl walked into your room, gazing around for a second until she spotted you, her gaze resting on the blade.

"Oh, gosh. Oh my gosh, okay." You didn't have the time to break the skin before you got distracted with the girl, so there was no fresh blood.

The stranger ran over, grabbing the wrist that was holding the blade before carefully pulling it out of your hand. "You're not doing that, not right now."

You were still mid-panic attack, so you didn't have the energy to fight back.

The 7th year looked at you for a moment, evaluating, then rested a hand on your shoulder, sliding down the wall to sit next to you.

"I'm Jennalie. Can I help you?" Her voice was soothing. You almost wanted to say yes, but you knew that saying yes wouldn't end well, so you shook your head.

Jennalie sighed. "Is there anyone I can grab who can help?" You shook your head again, still unable to form words while you were breathing so unevenly.

"Okay. Well if you change your mind, let me know. I've had panic attacks before, I know how awful they are, and how to help." She went to stand up, but you found yourself grabbing her arm.

"W-wait, p-please." You managed to get out. 

And Jennalie gave you a soft smile before wrapping her arms around you. You sobbed into her, allowing yourself to be vulnerable.

And out of everything you expected her to do, humming wasn't one of them. But that's what she did. She pulled you in even closer, ran her fingers down your hair, and hummed an unfamiliar song.

She had a very beautiful voice. Even when she wasn't forming words, her song calmed you. Your breathing slowed, your heart rate was no longer unreasonable, and you weren't shaking nearly as much.

And after a few minutes came the dreadful question. It always came. You knew she was going to ask it. What happened? But then she didn't.

"Are you okay?" Shocked for a minute, you sat still, but nodded after you came to your senses. "Okay. If you need anything, I'm room 532 in Ravenclaw, okay?"

You hadn't even noticed this girl wasn't a Slytherin in your distress. Ew. But oh, well, she helped.

Jennalie stood up and walked out of the bathroom, carefully bringing the blade with her, grabbing it off of the counter.

"And if your teacher asks where you were, say you were with me. They'll excuse you." She threw the words over her shoulder as she left.

And then you realized that you just had your second panic attack of the day. At 9 in the morning.

You stood up, wiping your cheeks and groaning, before grabbing your wand and heading to class.