The surgeon came out of the room again and I swear I felt my heart plummet to the floor. He was covered in more blood than before. Fresh blood.
He nodded at me and I walked over to him.
I had spent the last hour and a half trying to think of my life without Demi. And every time I did, I broke down. The problem was, I didn't have a life without her anymore. Only a few weeks ago, she was a stranger and now she's become my best friend. There was no me without her.
Strangers gave me sympathetic looks but I didn't want their sympathy. I wanted my Demi to be okay. If she did on the slight chance make it through this, I knew it was going to be an uphill battle for her. I wouldn't let her spiral into the darkness again, I couldn't let that happen. I also knew that she would be in hospital for a long time and I knew that I couldn't stay with her which shattered my heart but I knew she would get better if I wasn't around and if she weren't exposed to parties, drugs, alcohol and sluts.
Yes, sluts. Anyone who had used Demi for sex, to me, was a slut. They didn't truly care about her, or her wellbeing. All they cared about was getting their clit licked enough to have an orgasm. It seemed that's all college girls cared about though. Having an orgasm. It made me beyond angry that they could just use Dems for sex. How could you do that to such a precious soul? It was beyond me.
"She's stable, but critical." The surgeon informed me straightforwardly.
"Can I see her again?"
"Can we have a talk first, please?" He seemed concerned.
"Of course." I smiled.
He led me over to a couple of seats in a small enclosed room.
"Take a seat." He gestured.
I did as he said.
"Demetria, is she your girlfriend?"
I hesitated. I was scared if I told him the truth I would no longer be able to see her due to the rule being immediate family only.
"I-we- no, she's not." I gave in.
"You mentioned earlier that she was? And I heard you talking to her, it sure sounded like there was something there." He pushed.
"I love her. She doesn't know that yet. We only met a few weeks ago and we've become so close, its almost as if we've always been like this. She admitted her feelings first and I was scared to admit mine because I knew about her, you know, hurting herself." I inhaled. "I didn't want to be in the position where she could potentially take my heart with her if she ever did.. Well, this. Try and leave this world. But regardless, I admitted my feelings for her, to her. I didn't tell her I loved her, just that I liked her. And then this happened and now I'm starting to regret everything." I let everything out and was a blabbering mess by the end of my rant.
He stared at me with sympathy in his eyes as the tears kept appearing on the brim of my eyes. "You really love her, don't you?"
"With my body, heart and soul." I replied honestly. "I can't lose her."
He grabbed my hand. "We will do the best we can. You can go in and see her now."
~
I entered the room, my palms sweating. I was nervous. If anything like what happened last time was going to happen again, I didn't think I would hold my self together.
I trudged slowly towards her bed, grabbed her hand and planted a soft kiss on the top of it.
I inhaled deeply and began to speak. "Hey Dems, you're scaring me so much. I know you can hear me and I hate that I can't hear you. They still don't know if you'll make it. They keep saying you're in a critical condition and that the amount of pills you took could easily kill you but don't listen to them, okay? Because you are going to make it. I believe in you. You're gonna pull through this, because if you don't, I don't think I'll be okay. No, I know I won't be okay." My voice started to shake. "I'm sorry for all the times I got frustrated with you, Dee." I chuckled. "I still don't know which nickname you like better, so I can't decide which one to call you."
