'i see a world of colours that mean everything to me when all you can hear are notes that mean nothing to you'
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A slow paced, aesthetic, dreamy book based on songs and emotions | A list of stories that I never got to write~
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Updates twice...
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'woulda gave you anything'
It was all too much.
He didn't know how to put into words the sheer exhaustion of trying to be the best.
Every single day, it was the same routine, over and over again. At heart, he was a disciplined person, someone who could wake up at four-thirty sharp and sleep at three during crazy days.
Other times, he could go to bed at eight and sleep in until four-thirty.
That was discipline.
It was what had gotten him this far, it was the very thing that made him want to scream. The one day he didn't work out, the one day he chose not to do half an hour of reading was the day he felt lost.
And he was sick of it.
Sick of waking up and not having to think about what to do because everything was already thought about beforehand, sick of spending hours a day studying and playing music.
He loved it most days, but some days, they were rare, yes, but they were there, and those were the days when he would stop, take a look at himself, and wonder how on Earth he could even find the strength to wake up so early in the morning.
It was those days when he felt like the weight of the world was too heavy for a boy like him to carry, it was days like those that made him feel like throwing up from the sheer exhaustion from it all.
It didn't happen much.
But it still did.
And today was one of those days.
He couldn't help but stare at himself in the mirror, his watch resting on his wrist—where it always was.
This time, the ticking of the second hand didn't trigger him to spring into motion as it usually did. Instead, it just played in his head like a metronome, a quiet, calm rhythm that set the hairs on his arms alight.
There was no other way to describe the feeling.
It was that sort of feeling you get when you know you have an assessment due but can't find the strength to even look at it, let alone start working on the damn thing.
