The walk back home was a quiet one. The streets that had felt so solitary earlier now felt less intimidating with Jay by her side. Their steps fell into sync, and occasionally their shoulders brushed against each other, sending a subtle warmth through their bodies.
Y/N stole glances at Jay as they walked. It seemed he was just as lost in his thoughts as she was, his gaze focused on the path ahead. She wondered what he was thinking, if he was mad at her for abruptly leaving earlier or if he understood her need for space. The silence between them wasn't uncomfortable but it was still there.
When they got home, he closed the door and let out a sigh. "Take a shower and rest." That was all he said before he walked away, disappearing into his room while she stood there, somehow longing for more interaction. She could tell he was giving her the space she needed, but a part of her wished he would stay a little longer, talk a little more.
Y/N followed his advice and took a long, soothing shower. The warm water helped ease the tension that had been building up inside her. As she dried herself and changed into comfortable pajamas, her mind wandered back to Harin's words and her feelings for Jay. She settled in her bed, the events of the night playing in her mind like a vivid movie reel.
"Does he like me..." Her fingers absentmindedly traced the edge of her blanket as she whispered the thought aloud into the quiet room. The way his eyes locked onto hers during the walk, how his voice softened when he talked to her, the very fact that he had gone out of his way to find her in the park – all of these things spoke volumes.
Yet, doubt still lingered. Was she reading too much into his actions? Jay was a nice person to everyone so perhaps she was simply interpreting his kindness as something more.
Slowly standing up from the bed, she silently made her way to his room, wondering if he was still awake. It was almost two in the morning, and the house was quiet except for the soft hum of the night. The dim light from the hallway spilled into Jay's room as she approached, her heart fluttering nervously in her chest. The door was open and she could see him standing at the window with a cigarette between his fingers, his gaze fixed on the distant city lights.
She took a deep breath and softly cleared her throat. "Jay?"
His frame tensed slightly, the cigarette momentarily forgotten between his fingers. "Oh, Y/N, you're awake. Couldn't sleep?" He quickly stubbed out the cigarette and moved towards her.
"Yeah... you're smoking at two in the morning." She whispered, her eyes searching his face for any signs of anger or frustration.
"Yeah, bad habit, I know-"
"No, you only smoke when something's bothering you." She had noticed this pattern before, She had noticed this pattern before, how he turned to smoking during moments of stress. "Are you mad at me?"
He exhaled a slow breath, and his shoulders seemed to sag slightly. "No, sunshine. I can never be mad at you. I'm sorry I raised my voice at you earlier. I was worried but that's not how I should have handled it."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you worry. I just... I needed some time alone to think."
Jay reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair from her face. "About what?" A faint blush crept onto her cheeks, his question taking her off guard. How would she tell him that she feels guilty about moving on from Sungho while also realizing her growing feelings for Jay? "What's bothering you, sunshine?"
Y/N looked into his eyes behind his glasses, hers slightly welling with tears. "You know, there's a part of me that wants to move on, to find happiness again, but there's also a part of me that feels guilty for even considering it." Before she realized it, she broke down crying and Jay's gaze softened, his arms gently wrapping around her in a comforting embrace.
He held her close, letting her tears flow without saying a word. Listening to her pour out her pain felt like knives piercing his own heart. He was so in love with her that he would do anything to ease her burdens, even if it meant shouldering some of the pain himself.
When her sobs began to quiet, he pulled back slightly to look at her, his thumb brushing away the remnants of tears on her cheeks. "Sunshine," he began gently, "you have every right to find happiness again. You deserve it, more than anyone I know. Sungho will always hold a special place in your heart, and that's something no one can take away. It's okay."
"But is it okay if I like you?" Y/N watched him freeze, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. He seemed taken aback by her confession, and for a moment, the world held its breath."I mean... you're just so kind and so gentle it makes my heart flutter-"
Jay's hand held hers and he pulled it to his chest, resting it against the fabric of his shirt while he looked deeply into her eyes. "See? My heart is also beating a little faster," he said, a soft chuckle tugging at the corners of his lips. "Being with you, talking to you, spending time together – it all makes me feel like I'm walking on air. You ask if liking me is okay. If being with me makes you happy and helps you heal, then it's more than okay. But I also care about what's best for you. I don't want to rush or pressure you into anything. Your heart needs time to heal."
Y/N's heart swelled with love at his words. Jay was the kind of person she had never expected to come into her life, especially after the heartache she had experienced. Yet, here he was, holding her hand against his chest, his steady heartbeat reassuring her in ways she hadn't thought possible.
"I think I fell a little more in love with you just now." She replied softly, her fingers intertwining with his.
"I think my heart just skipped a beat hearing you say that." He squeezed her hand gently, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on her skin. "And I'm still falling for you, more and more every day."
"Really?" She smiled a little, making him pause and gaze at her, mesmerized by the way her eyes sparkled in the fading light.
"Always," He affirmed with a warmth in his voice. "You make falling in love feel like the most beautiful and natural thing in the world, sunshine."
