~❦︎ ℒ𝒶𝓈𝓉 ℬ𝓁𝒶𝒹ℯ ~ 𝗔 𝗧𝗢𝗠 𝗞𝗔𝗨𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗭 𝗙𝗔𝗡𝗙𝗜𝗖

Past❤︎

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★✰✯

I woke up to the sun shining and peaking through the curtains in the room. I got up and stretched as I yawned from my long slumber. It's been about 3 year since I left germany and I think it was the best decision of my life. Honestly me and Julia have been doing really good, we have a nice house. Friends, and there is great food here so im definitely not complaining

I walked over to my bathroom to do my buisness and wash my face. I then make my way to the kitchen to see Julia sitting at the bar stool counter drinking coffee on her phone.

"Morning" I said as I took a mug from the cup cabinet then pouring some coffee in the empty cup.

"Goodmorning sleepy head" she replied chuckling a bit looking up at me.

"You have work today?" She asked as I stood there taking a sip of my fresh coffee.

"Uh no I will have work on Tuesday though why?" I said with a askingly expression.

"Because hi zu and Toshii wants to go to a club tonight, they invited us. I guess its new" julia said excitedly.

"Sure what time?" I asked.

"8pm, they don't close until 12. They Said it's called club sharades"

"Ohhh sounds interesting I've never heard of them before"

"Okay well I'm going to go grocery shopping"

"Alright I'll probably watch some movies." I replied watching her walk over to get her coat and keys with her purse.

"Okay have fun then, love you!" She said yellingly as she walked out of the door. I waved back with a smile and chuckled to myself.

I walked over to the living room and turned on one of the movie streaming channels and searched for a movie, I decided to choose the movie thirteen. I love this movie, I hurried and snuggled on the couch already invested in the movie.

(This next paragraph talks about Ed and unplanned pregnancy)

After the movie was over I decided to take a shower to wake myself up more. I hurried into the bathroom grabbing my towel, I turned on the shower to warm and began to undress. It was starting to warm up as I went over to the mirror. I still rember germany and all the bad memories, I never wanna live like that again. It was horrible how I was treated. I may sound dramatic but I didn't like living like how I was, shooting people being normal. Racing for money, killing people, guns money drugs. I just never saw myself being mixed in with that type of stuff, only because I never wanted to but I guess I was to curious. And I know that now, that when I was there it will always leave a dent in me that I had to live like that. I trailed my eyes down my body looking at every inch and curve to my body, I still feel his hands and how they guided me holding me. My eyes then landed upon my lower side above my hip, the small scar it left, you could see where it had been stitched and how it healed over after 2 years. It was about a year later when I really was pregnant. I had it for about 5 months, the reason why I had a miscarriage was because when I lived in germany I starved myself and that's why I kept throwing up was because my body wasn't getting the protein and fluids it needed, I was basically throwing up my insides because the baby couldn't eat meaning it would die in a matter of time. But I wasn't aware I had a child inside of me. So I couldn't save it, so once I moved to tokyo I started to get very ill, I fainted one night because I had a sharp and jagged pain in my lower stomach. They rushed me to the hospital and told me my baby had died, they had to cut me open and take the baby before it caused more problems in my stomach, it was basically feeding off of my insides, the fetus was extremely small because it had no room to grow. Which ment it was dying. After that happened I went into a heavy depression that I carried a child I didn't even know about, I had a peice of him inside of me that I had no idea about. It killed me that I couldn't do anything about my unborn child.