can yiu tell hes just the equivalent to miguel? good.
♥︎
Izuru was a quiet, reserved person for the most part.
Usually managing canon events and such, he normally just sits in his area and keeps to himself.
Sometimes, he can be seen talking to his little AI assistant, a program made by Chihiro Fujisaki especially for Izuru.
He seems to be a little more expressive and emotional in her presence, besides the fact that she's supposed to be a helper to him..
She seems to also be his friend.
Probably his only friend.
Friend? If you could even call it that.
No one dared to pry as to why Kamukura was so close to her, Chihiro knew, but they wouldn't dare tell anyone, they were respectful of other's privacy, especially considering they were a programmer and hacker.
Makoto knew, but he was also respectful.
There was a handful of some others who knew, but they were all respectful enough to know he deserved privacy.
Some people just don't tell others about their canon events.
Izuru hated that memory, the memory of loosing his Chiaki, the Chiaki from his world.
She died in the rubble, she didn't even know her boyfriend was Spider-Man.
He tried to prevent it, he couldn't loose her, not like this, not now, not ever.
Blood splattered all over the ground, onto his shoes even, as she was crushed.
Izuru cried for the first time in his life.
He was a little more expressive back then, now he just keeps a straight face to nearly everything.
He felt numb.
Then, he found a universe.
A perfect candidate for his new life.
Earth 401-B.
He smiled for the first time since he and Chiaki got together.
He was supposed to die right about then, during a fight against a villain. He did, he was gone, for a few moments, but then.. Izuru came and replaced himself.
He interfered with a canon event.
He was with Chiaki for a 3 days, 3 days before her universe, her earth, Earth 401-B, collapsed in on itself.
People started glitching out, he was running with Chiaki in his arms, she was scared, and confused, and crying.
He was panicking, for the first time in his life, he didn't know what to do.
He was trying to teleport already, go back to his own world, trying to fix anything.
His bracelet simply could not work.
He didn't know why, he kept trying, he looked at it as quickly as possible, nothing seemed wrong with it.
It simply could not connect to another world, because this one was collapsing.
No portal could be opened, therefore he could not save Chiaki.
She disappeared with a glitch in Izuru's arms.
He stared at his now empty arms, a weight lifted from it.
It wasn't a calming type of weight being lifted.
He wanted that weight back again, wanted Chiaki in his arms if only for a second more.
He couldn't have that.
The consequences of his actions had hit him.
He looked wide-eyed at his arms.
The arms he so wished were wrapped around Chiaki once more.
Tears welled in his eyes for the second time of his life, for the same exact reason as the first.
This time his reaction was worse.
The first time, he cried silently.
But now, he dropped to his knees, staring at his arms, almost confused as to where Chiaki was.
He felt stuck, hopeless.
Then all the emotions hit him like a sack of bricks all at once.
He realized Chiaki was actually gone.
Gone forever, and he didn't know if he'd ever find another earth with her.
And he knew he now, could never go on another earth with her.
He sobbed weakly for a moment, hunched on the floor in a way.
he was looking down, his arms supporting his body, still on his knees.
He was slumped, crying to himself weakly.
He didn't care about anyone else, didn't care about the copious amounts of other people dead.
He only cared that Chiaki was gone, again.
He let out a choked sob, he wanted her back.
He didn't know how to process these emotions, he'd only cried twice in his life, only experienced such pain twice.
None of the lobotomies he's had, none of the pain, none of the tests, none of the exhaustion, none of his parents leaving him, nothing could hurt more than loosing the one person he could ever love, for the second time.
He could never love again, he knew that.
He couldn't love anyone, he could be fond of some at most, but that was a rare occurrence.
He didn't love his parents, didn't love himself, didn't love his friends.
He only ever had, and ever will, love Chiaki Nanami.
He cried silently on the now empty earth for hours.
He wanted Chiaki again.
He wanted to feel love again.
He got a glimpse of his shoe..
It had the blood of his worlds Nanami.
He sobbed quietly, it didn't sound like he was even crying, he sounded like he was suffocating; choking.
He had never cried like this, even when Chiaki died the first time, he just stared at his shoes and the floor as tears fell down his eyes.
He didn't sob.
He shook his head, almost like he was denying it.
Like he was denying what had just happened.
He was in agony.
He didn't know why everything was suddenly hurting.
His chest- he- he felt suffocated- like he was drowning, he felt like his heart was being held in place so it couldn't beat properly.
His chest hurt.
He let out a choked noise, murmuring Chiaki's name quietly under his breath, followed by a cry.
His voice had cracked for the first time in his life, it sounded hoarse.
It pitched up when he said the last part of her name, he saw the tears fall onto the floor, making little puddles.
He cried weakly, slowly quieting down.
He fell asleep on the ground, where he was standing when his girlfriend disappeared in his arms.
He sobbed quietly, curling in on himself.
He missed Chiaki.
He missed her, and she had only just left.
It felt like all his hope for the future had been forcefully sucked out of his body.
He felt dead.
And to be honest? He wished he was.
