She's not mine | 𝔍𝔢𝔫𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔞

Chapter 63

Jennie

I'm barely thinking straight as I walk to our bedroom, tears streaming down my face and Lisa on my heels.

"Baby," Lisa pleads. "Please. Please trust that I'll fix this."

I whirl around to face her. "How?" I shout. "How will you fix this, Lisa? Articles about us are all over the internet. It isn't as simple as suing just one single magazine, and even if we do, it's too late!"

I walk into our wardrobe and yank my clothes off the hangers, my movements erratic.

"Jennie," Lisa says, her voice breaking. "What are you doing, Cupcake? You can't... don't do this. I beg of you, don't do this, Jennie."

I shake my head and grab my suitcase. "I'm not spending another moment in the same house as her. I've tried, Lisa. For years, I've tried, sacrificing my damn soul to keep her happy in the process. I can't take much more."

She grabs my shoulders and holds onto me tightly, panic flashing through her eyes. "You're insane if you think I'll let you go."

I shake my head. "I'm not giving you a choice, Lisa. I can't do this. I can't spend the rest of my life being tormented by my own sister. I can't deal with the constant snide remarks, the guilt trips, the manipulation, the lies."

"Then I'll make her leave, Jennie. There's nothing I won't do to ensure your happiness." She said.

I wrap my arms around her neck and look into her eyes, my heart breaking. "You know your grandmother won't let her leave. She wants Irene safe and sound in the Manoban compound. She wants the two of you to figure out how to co-parent, and Grandma isn't going to give up until you two resolve your issues. Irene is carrying a Manoban baby, Lisa. She's pregnant with your child. I can't... I just can't do this."

"What does that mean, my love?"

I take a step away. "I don't know yet, Lisa. I just... all I'm asking for is some time to think, nothing more. I can't be around her right now. I can't sit back and watch her attempt to destroy my life. Not again. I'm scared that if I stay, I'll do or say something I'll regret. I can't bite my tongue right now, and the last thing I want to do is harm her health. What happens if I upset her right now, and she faints again? It's your child that'd be at risk, Lisa. I can't have that on my conscience."

I start to fill my suitcase, throwing things into it without thinking. The mere idea of being around Irene right now makes my skin crawl.

"Besides, I need to think about whether this is truly what I want. There's no doubt in my mind that I love you, Lisa." I pause and turn to face her. "But let me give you a moment of honesty. I'm not sure our love can survive her. She tore us apart once, and we both know she won't stop until she does it again. What kind of life is that? Your wife and the mother of your child fighting at every turn? What kind of environment would that create for your son or daughter? What about me? What toll will it take on me to constantly be fighting with my sister? To have her sabotage my marriage?"

Lisa drops down to her knees in front of me and grabs my hands. "I know how hard it is, baby. I know I shouldn't even be asking this of you, considering everything you've been through so far, everything you have yet to endure, but I'm not above begging. I can't see a life without you, Jennie. I'm begging you. Please, let's find a way to get through this together."

I shake my head and pull my hand out of her. "I need some space, Lisa. All I'm asking for is a little bit of space to think about what I want. All my life, I've catered to everyone I loved, but not once has anyone asked me what I want out of life. Even marrying you was something I was told to do. I'm tired of living my life by other people's rules. I can't keep doing this. All my life, I've been manipulated, forced to conform until I fit in the boxes others built for me. And I did it - with a smile on my face. What for? What did I do it for, Lisa? This marriage has cost me my sanity and my career, and that would be worth it if I'd got you in return, but I didn't. Even now, after the price I've been forced to pay, it's the three of us in this marriage. It always will be. As the mother of your child, she'll always be a part of our lives. And I... I don't know if that's something I can live with."

Lisa stares down at the floor, still on her knees in front of me. "One week," she says, her voice soft. "I'll give you one week to think things through while I fix the mess Irene caused." She looks up at me. "But you should know that no matter what you decide, I will never be with her. I will never give her another chance. For the rest of my life, you are the only woman I will love. I know I've hurt you, Jennie. I know I made you promises that I forgot about, but that will never happen again. You are my entire world, and I'm going to do everything in my power to ensure that I'm deserving of you, that I'm worth coming back to."

I smile at her, the feeling bittersweet. "You were always worth it," I whisper. "And I will always love you. I just need to ensure that the life I'm choosing to live is one that allows me to love myself too. Being around Irene makes me lose sight of who I am, Lisa. Can't you see?"

She grabs my hand and brings it to her lips, kissing my hand with such tenderness that it brings tears to my eyes. I see the pleas in her eyes, the silent promises.

"I will fix this," she tells me. "So come home to me in a week, okay?"

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