Tales from the archive

Burning hatred

I watched it crawl away with only one arm, its left arm and legs lay severed on the floor. Even though it acted, sounded, and looked human, I can see through its deception, it's good enough to fool most but not me. It's one of those things. It's kind is responsible for what I have now become.

Ever since I touched that damn cube when I was 7 years old, I have lost my touch on my emotions. There are only a few strong emotions that I can really feel, the rest have dulled out. Sadness, love, jealousy, happiness, and most emotions, all nearly gone. I can't even really feel pain anymore, last time I felt pain was when the cube ripped the flesh from my hands and turned me into this. The strongest emotion I can even feel is the burning hatred I feel for those things. And the second strongest is feelings of affection or attraction for a boy named Max in my class. Why do I like him? Why am I so obsessed with him? Why do I secretly take pictures of him? Why do I feel a hint of jealousy when he is talking to other girls? How does he make me feel 'human' again?

Maybe because he made me feel something, something other than the burning hatred and anger, other than the absolute nothingness I feel, something that made me feel a sliver of joy. And I just wanted to take it, wanted to hold and latch on to anything that will make me feel anything remotely happy.

The thing disguised as a man was still crawling away in a desperate attempt to flee. How adorable, I can't help but envy its capability to feel these emotions but then I remember that these things stole it from me and it fuels the flames of hatred. If it weren't for them I would've been normal, I would've acted normal. But because of them, and what they took from me I have to remind myself to blink, misspeak, and breathe even though I no longer need to do those things anymore I have to do it to fit in. I wouldn't have to practice how to smile that doesn't come out creepy, I wouldn't have to eat human hearts. I wouldn't have this black substance coming from my eye that many have mistook for washed up mascara.

The thing was still dragging its body away, blood and those damned cubes came from its missing limbs which were still steaming and dissolving into small cubes, but it couldn't get far enough. It turns around and pleads for its life. "P-Please, don't k-kill me. W-why are you doi—" it pleaded before I sliced its head in half. Cubes and blood came out and steam came from where I had cut and I couldn't help but smile, it's times like this that make me feel alive.

I can't help but ponder on what it would be like if I didn't touch that damn cube all those years ago. Wonder about what if those cubes didn't exist. I would've been normal maybe...maybe me and Max could've had an unquantifiable and pleasant relationship. Smile without it coming off as creepy and unnatural. Emote without it causing me so much frustration. But because of those damn cubes, those evils who should not exist, I can't do those now because of them. This makes me hate them more. I will ensure that I will destroy all of them, rid their evils from this world. Only then can I save the world, only then can I feel satisfied, only then will this burning hatred fizzle out and die.