A Crimson Rainbow

Chapter 3

A few days before my worldview was shattered, word had spread around school that Jared was going to be throwing a massive party at his home for his 18th birthday.  Now, as I mentioned, the story goes that his parents were practically swimming in money, but since only a small handful of people from school had actually been to his house, a lot of us were unsure whether to believe it or not.  Strangely enough, even though we were so close when we were younger, I never ended up going to his house for some reason.  So imagine our surprise when, all of a sudden, practically the whole year level was invited to his 18th.
Already, rumours were spreading that his parents were hiring Calvin Harris to DJ, among other things, so I had no clue what to actually believe.  Even though we had barely spoken for a few years, I figured it would be good to go along, but wanted to be sure it wasn't some sort of set-up.  In all the time I knew Jared, he had never once lied to me, so I decided to ask him if we were truly invited.
During first break, I saw him go to his locker, and figured this was as good a moment as ever.  I looked around, to make sure Stefi wasn't about to turn up, then took a breath and walked the few steps to him.
Jared looked at me after he closed his locker, and, to my surprise, smiled.  "Hey man, how are you?  What's up?"  He held his hand, waiting for me to high-five it.
I looked at it a moment too long before awkwardly clapping it, then jumped straight into it.  "Um, is this talk of a party at yours this weekend true?" I asked.
"Yeah man," he said.  "You should totally come!  I know Mum would be glad to see you, she keeps asking how you are."
I was shocked.  I honestly thought they would have forgotten about me by now.  And Jared actually seemed glad I could be going to his party.  Had I been misreading the situation the past few years?
"Oh, ok, well I guess I'll be there," I told Jared, before turning and walking away.  I only got a few steps before I heard my name being called out.  I turned around, and Jared was still in the same spot, watching me.
"I hope you do," he smiled.  "Come, I mean."  Then it was his turn to smile awkwardly and walk away.
Ok, so I've been known to read into things WAY too much in the past, but I swear Jared just flirted with me.  He was the first person I came out to, and he took it really well.  He had no issue with it at all, and even told me he had suspicions for a while, before giving me the biggest hug I have ever had, even now.  When we were still friends, he never treated me any differently after I came out.  Even after drifting apart, he still never said anything mean to me or about me.  I began to wonder if we had ever actually stopped being friends, or if it was just in my imagination.
All I knew in that moment is that, after that smile he gave me, I was definitely going to his party this weekend.

Later that same day, another rumour started spreading around the school.  According to the gossip, Jared had broken up with Stefi.  Not only was this huge news because they were like the power couple, but Stefi had always been the one who did the breaking up - nobody had ever dumped her before.  The reasons for the break-up, according to the rumour-mill, ranged from "she was cheating with some guy online", to "he finally realised how much of a bitch she is", but the one that got my attention, especially after what happened earlier that day, is "he had feelings for someone else".
My mind had gone on overdrive with the (albeit slim) chance that Jared wanted me.  Even Ellie had noticed I was more energetic than usual - don't worry, I was still as absent-minded - and wondered what was going on.  Of course, I told her my theory, and she thought what little mind I still had had taken long service leave.  Have I mentioned how supportive my friends are?
As the school-day came to an end, I managed to catch Jared as he was leaving.  Since he was, at the very least, being friendly with me again, I decided I should ask if he was ok.
"Yeah, I'm fine.  Never been better," he smiled at me.
"Ok, well, I'm glad to hear that," I replied.  Unsure what to say after that, Jared broke the awkward silence.
"I'm guessing there are rumours going around about why I broke up with her?" He asked, as he slung his bag higher on his shoulder.
"Yeah," I really wasn't sure what to say, and figured he was going to hear them eventually.  "There are so many reasons going around."
Jared smiled in the way he was known for, a way that had always made my knees shake, and now was no different.  "What's your favourite?" He asked.
I gulped, unsure which one would be the least hurtful to him.  As they all seemed to be laced with at least a bit of accuracy, I offered, "That you had feelings for someone else, I guess.  At least it doesn't put anybody at fault."
Jared looked at me, smiled and gave a soft, one-breath laugh.  "Yeah," he said eventually.  "I guess that's a good one."  He looked back at me and smiled.  "Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow."
And with that, I watched him walk away from the school, leaving me even more confused than I already was.  Jared seemed to always have a knack of answering a question in a way that could have meant anything, and I learned long ago that, if I tried to read into them too much, it made my brain hurt.
Logically, I felt that I was only setting myself up for heartache if I allowed myself to believe he had feelings for me, but at the same time, I had never seen him look at Stefi the way he looked at me.  In fact, I don't remember him looking at anyone else in that way, which really didn't help my mind from slipping into a spiral of delusions where Jared was ... well, let's just say I'm unsure if he is as flexible as my mind is telling me.