And To Love In Return... (BOOK 2)

Runway Trainwreck

Wooyoung's POV:

"Wooyoung, you're up. Go!"

Cameras were flashing in every direction as the music screamed through the speakers.

I was tired, starving, and dehydrated, but all of that struggle gets thrown out the door once I start walking on the runway.

This was my second show in Tokyo. My first was a year and a half ago for Nicola Formichetti. All they had to tell me was that he's Lady Gaga's ex stylist and I was in. This time it was for Jun Takahashi; I was truly honored.

I reached the end of the runway, struck a subtle pose, and made my way back around. I wish it was over, but I had two more looks to show off. It's not that I'm ungrateful or anything, I just really miss home. I miss San.

He graduated college this year so things will be a little easier for us I hope. We've pushed through every obstacle just like we said we would, but I don't think that's very surprising. I feel bad for him because deep down I know he hates my job nowadays. He's supportive just like he's been from the start, but it starts to take its toll sometimes.

"Someone give Wooyoung his next outfit please! Let's move people!"

Chaos. Every day is just chaos.

If I get a moment of relaxation, I may just break down and cry from the relief. But I haven't had a moment of peace in a long time. It doesn't matter what area of my life it is, there will always be mayhem.

Back out onto the runway I went with my blank, fashionable stare and expensive clothes. It's always the same nowadays. In the beginning, it was adrenaline rushing, but now I want it to stop before it even starts.

"Great job, everyone!" But I don't complain too much because it's over before I even know it.

I went back to my hotel alone while everyone else celebrated. I haven't made any friends in the modeling world. I tried one time, but they got a little too close for my liking.

"Wooyoungie, you know what I'm gonna say." San sighed, watching me smoke a cigarette on FaceTime.

"And you expect me to stop at a time like now?" I shouted, getting rather defensive.

"Trust me, baby, I get it. But-"

"No, clearly you don't!"

All I wanted to do was have a cigarette or two on the hotel balcony and be on the phone with my boyfriend, but I guess that was too much to ask.

"Right, I'm sorry." He sighed. "How was the show?"

"It was fine." I shrugged. "Nothing special."

"Did you get to keep anything?"

"Not this time." I shook my head.

"Do you know when you're coming home?"

"God, San! What's with all the stupid questions tonight?" I lashed out.

"I'm sorry." He sounded defeated. "I know you're stressed."

"You think?" I snapped, taking a drag from my cigarette. I shook my head, already fed up.

"Hyunjin broke into their apartment again." San mumbled.

And that would be the reason for my stress.

"God, that fucking idiot."

"And he had a nosebleed in class."

"San, I can't do this much longer. I feel like I'm just sitting back and watching his downfall while I'm out here in fucking Tokyo living my life."

"Invite him over the apartment or something. Make him come home."

"He spends all his money on cocaine, I can't." I groaned.

"Your money." Right. My fucking money. "But if you just bought him a flight instead of giving him the money to do it, I don't see why there'd be a problem."

"True. Except he'd probably start swinging if he knew who stayed in the guest room."

How did Felix end up living in my apartment? Crazy little story there. Actually not so crazy. Minho is missing. His parents think he's dead somewhere. Felix refuses to mourn until he sees a body.

"Felix can go home for a little bit."

I don't want to assume he's dead because that's really harsh, but unfortunately I think the worst rather quickly. But it's been a year, I don't think it's that crazy. I don't have a gut feeling about it though so I keep relying on that. It's truly a terrifying situation. But because San and I have some hope, Felix wanted to be around us more than his parents.

"You talk to him then."

San's screen paused so I knew he was in the middle of texting the small blonde.

"He said he'd go to Lily's."

"I always forget about her."

Lily would be his girlfriend. It's actually his first legitimate relationship since Hyunjin. I want to be happy for him, I really do. But even after all this time, I don't think he's right for anyone other than his first love.

"You know Hyunjin would probably never talk to you again if he knew you and Felix were buddy-buddy."

"First off, it's not like that." I groaned. "Felix made it very clear that he's impatiently waiting for Hyunjin to come home permanently. You know he's made up his mind."

"Yeah, that was before Lily."

If Felix had zero intention of getting back together with Hyunjin in the future, I never would've given him the time of day. But when the kid starts crying and asking how he could get into contact with Hyunjin because he misses him, you start to question things.

"I'm not worried about her." I dismissed. "She's a fun girl, but she's not Hyunjin."

I finished the rest of my cigarette, almost feeling uneasy by my last words. I still put Hyunjin on this pedestal as if he isn't this deadbeat in the making. Nonetheless, he's still my best friend and I made a promise. He may have shut me out, but I'm fairly certain he'll come back around. He always does, especially when he's hit rock bottom. There's been about five of those in the last two years. His guardian angel must be a drill sergeant up in heaven because I don't know how else Hyunjin is breathing.

"Make the call when you get home."

"That'll be in a month."

I actually do know my schedule. I just refrain from telling San because I'm afraid of how he'll react. He's taken it well every time, but for some reason I still can't shake the guilt of not being consistently home for months on end.

"Okay." San sighed, sounding disappointed.

"I'm sorry, San, I don't know what else you want from me." I throw my hand up in frustration.

"All I said was 'okay', I know how this works. You know I just miss you, that's all." Hearing the affectionate words slightly calmed me down.

"I miss you too." I slightly pouted. I looked away from the night sky, then to San's smiling face. "What?" I whined, clearly missing something.

"Even when you're bitchy, you're still cute."

"I'm not bitchy!" I continued to whine which just made him laugh. "Sannie, I am not bitchy!"

"Fine, you're not bitchy." I nodded, feeling satisfied once he agreed. "I love you." I could kill someone and he'd still look at me with eyes like that. That adoration never fails to disappear nor does it fail to make me smile.

"Even though I'm bitchy?" I teased.

"I'll love you no matter what."