Jānakī Manoharā Ābhā : The Twins of Ramā

3 | Vedanā

Vedanā

(Lit.) Agony, pain. Something which irks one out.

Rama stared at the royal scrolls. The table was covered in the scrolls, one of taxes, one of policies, one of trade, one of agreements, one of landlord settlements, one of monthly stock, one of agriculture and the list went on.

He sighed and turned to look at Taksha, his eldest nephew who was now two years old, sleeping peacefully with a serene smile. Rama couldn't help but to notice the uncanny resemblence between Bharata and Taksha. The same eyes, which were inherited from Kaikeyi, the same smile which was of Dasharatha.

"Jijashree? May I come in?" The voice of Kushadhvaja Nandini echoed in the silent chambers of Rama. Rama passed a smile, "Does a sister need permission to enter her brother's room?"

Mandavi entered the room. "Did Taksha trouble you?"

Rama passed a giggle, "No. Not at all. He was very calm and after few stories he fell asleep. He always has been a calm boy like Bharata"

"But his little brother doesn't seem to like that idea. Poor Urmila and Lakshmana have been struggling to put Angada to sleep. I was just passing by and oh god, that chamber is in chaos" Mandavi marked as she tried to pick up Taksha.

The little toddler had no plans on leaving the room of Jyesta Pitashree, he woke up and became cranky in seconds! 

"Ma-Ma..no..Me sleeping..with..J-Jyesta..Pitashree," Taksha protested.

Rama smiled at Taksha who was protesting to sleep with Rama. Mandavi tried hard to control her little one, "Baccha, no.. Jyesta Pitashree has lots of work to do, you can't trouble him right?"

But the little one was strong on his words. Rama spoke, "Let him sleep here for tonight,Mandavi. Besides, I'm almost done with my work. Takshu and Jyesta Pitashree will enjoy tonight right?"

In his half-asleep state, Taksha offered a sleepy smile and contentedly sucked his thumb. Mandavi sighed, "Sometimes I wish he hadn't inherited my stubbornness. I now understand how my mother felt dealing with me."

Mandavi left the chambers of Rama soon. Rama was now carrying a sleeping Taksha in his arms. Taksha was the light of the entire family.

Afterall, he was the first good news that came after Sita's banishment. Kausalya, Rama's mother was delighted when she first held Taksha. Kausalya hated the fact that she didn't have the opportunity to see or hold her elder grandchildren.

And Rama, what to say, everynight he just blames himself for Sita's banishment.

I wish I went againt the royal rules and follow Janaki. In the first wish that I hadn't left her alone in the forest. I failed to protect her twice. She doesn't deserve me. I failed to fulfill the promises I gave to Rajarishi Siradhvaja when marrying Janaki. As a father, I'm filled with uncertainty, not even knowing if I have fathered sons or daughters, or perhaps both!

The sisters of Sita had their own fears and anger. Rama once had heard Shrutakeerti talking to Shatrughna that how good it would have been if her Sita Jyestaa was there to guide and teach her how to be a good queen.

Each time Rama gazed upon those around him, he carried a heavy burden of responsibility, blaming himself for their suffering and anger. This overwhelming sense of guilt was the primary reason he rarely ventured out of his chamber. When he did, it was solely to fulfill his duties in attending the royal proceedings.

Despite the weight of his guilt, Rama understood that he had a duty to his people and his kingdom. He felt a deep sense of responsibility to ensure justice and maintain order. So, he made the effort to participate in the royal proceedings, even though he preferred solitude.

Rama's presence in the court brought a sense of calm and fairness. His wisdom and just decisions were respected by all, and his commitment to the welfare of his subjects remained unwavering. While he struggled with his inner turmoil, he knew that he had a kingdom to protect and a people to serve.

"Pi-Pitashree!" Sometimes when Taksha was too lazy, he would just call Rama as Pitashree and no one minded it.

"Yes love?"

"Can you tell me a-nother story? Please?"

"Of course! What kind of story!"

"Anything would do!"

Rama couldn't help but wonder and wander his thoughts away from the palace.

Would his kids also be asking for stories?

Are they naughty?

Whom do they look like? (Rama personally wanted them to look like his Sita)

Are they calm?

Do they often recieve scoldings from their mother?

Do they trouble her alot?

And Rama thoughts continued as his mouth told a story to Taksha about the destiny.