The Reaping begins and everybody in District 12 stands around a large stage. Ellie Phant walks onto the stage wearing a large yellow hat, a poufy dress, and a pair of platform heels. She walks over to the girls' dish and draws out a name.
"Plum Limabean," she shouts.
Darn. I was really hoping to be in the games with Garth. He has a 90% chance of being called. Ughhhhhhhhh
"I volunteer." I say. Ellie looks like she's going to fall off the stage in joy. Plum is escorted away by the Peacekeepers and I run up to the stage. Ellie claps her hands like a seal to congratulate me, but nobody else joins in. She frowns and walks over to the boys' dish and pulls out another name.
"Peewee ArfArf."
He hops up onto the stage and stares intensely into my eyes.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" I scream.
"What's the problem?" says Ellie.
"I WANTED TO BE WITH GARTH!" I yell. I Hulk smash Peewee's face and he starts crying.
Then it is time to go in a train to the Capitol so Peewee, Ellie, and I all board the train.
"It's time to meet your mentor," says Ellie. She motions towards the door and a fat hairy man walks in.
"Hey people. I'm Hammy," says the man. I look over at Peewee and he stares at me while cradeling his newly formed black eye.
"So, you're going to show us how to win?" I say.
"Yeah. Three rules: Be able to eat a lot, withstand a lot of pain, and have good reflexes. Those are the skills you usually need to pass the three stages of The Derp Games."
Eat a lot? I got this competition in the bag. Peewee will probably lose though, since he cried from me lightly tapping his face.
"Let's start the practice now. BRING OUT THE FOOD," I say. Nothing happens.
"I SAID, BRING OUT THE FOO-"
"Shut-up Dogpiss. It doesn't work like that. I make the calls, not you.....BRING OUT THE FOOD!" says Hammy.
10 little circus monkeys bring out trays of food to the table and I go over and sit down. I start shoving my face and the train comes to a stop. The train doors open and millions of Capitol people stare at the food hanging from my mouth. Peewee turns to them and gives them the peace-sign. The crowd goes crazy and starts to mimic Peewee's crazy hand gesture.
"You better work on your skills. This boy knows what hes doing," says Hammy.
YOU ARE READING
The Derp Games
HumorIn the ruins of a place once known as Canada lies the nation of Panda, a perfect Capitol surrounded by 12 outlying districts. The Capitol is despicable and cruel and keeps the districts in line by forcing them all to send one boy and one girl to par...
