The Derp Games

Chapter 7: The Derp Games Begin

I wake up to the screech of a familiar voice; Ellie.

"Time to get up bitches!" she screams. She pounds on my door and I sit up and walk over to the door. After repeatedly punching Ellie in the face, I shut the door and walk back to bed...until a man knocks at the door.

"UGGGHHHHH let me sleep!" I scream. I open the door to reveal Cinnaboo standing in silence.

"Sorry hun, but its time for the Games," says Cinnaboo with his natural flamboyant nature.

I nod with a frown on my face and he escorts me to a large room. They have these every year. You stand on a large square platform and it rises you up to the stage, where the first round of the Derp Games begin. However, they don't tell you what the first round is going to be until everyone is on stage. The entire Derp Games is broadcasted across the nation and the sponsers who support your district can help you in all three of the rounds. In the food round, each sponser can pay a large amount of money for one food object to be taken off your plate. In the strength/pain round, each tribute must go against a person. If they beat them, they move up to the next round of tributes. Then they must beat that person in the same task in order to move up again, and so on. The strength rounds only get harder as time goes on. The sponsers can pay money to automatically move you up a round. In the reflexes round, the sponsers can buy you special equipment to help you get as far as you need to go. Most of the tributes only get a few things for each of the rounds, but a sponser can be the difference between winning, and humiliation.

In the hallway, I pass Ellie with her swollen face and she glares at me. We approach the room and Hammy is standing in front of it.

"Don't waste any time on the food round! You've got this!" he says.

I nod and enter the room. Cinnaboo gives me a thumbs up, and i find my place on the square platform. I'm risen up to the stage in the middle of a large, open, grassy field, and look around to see my competition. I see the the tributes from Districts 1 & 2: Shiny, Chop, Cradle, and Marty, to my far right. I also see that mischievous girl, Ratface, a few paces to my right. Everybody is to my right, except for Peewee. He is directly next to me, on my left. I guess everyone is lined up by district.

I make eye contact with Peewee, who looks like he's going to throw-up, but when he sees me looking at him, he blushes and flips his short hair. I raise an eyebrow.

Oh yeah...I completely forgot my strategy! I have to pretend to like Peewee! That way, we can get more sponsers and make it further in each round. However, I doubt Peewee will make it very far anyway. It would be better for him to leave in the early rounds, than to have me beat him later on. I decide I better just stick with the plan. The cameras fan out across all of the tributes, and when it reaches me, I turn to Peewee and kiss him full on the lips. I finally let go when the cameras turn to the announcers, Ranch Puncherman and Claudia TemperSloth. Peewee looks at me with a wide grin and whispers,

"I knew you loved me."

I nod shakily,

"Yeah, totally! Its true, I'm crazy about you," I say. Im laughing in my head but I want to look good for the cameras, so I keep a straight face.

"This year, for the food round of the competition, the various tributes will have to do...a cherry pie eating contest!" says Ranch.

"Hehe yes..." says Claudia with a weird nasally voice. That chick is weird.

Darn. I hate pie. I really do! Out of all of the foods they could pick, they picked cherry pie!? Now, for you pie lovers out there, you might think I'm crazy, but pie is just disgusting.

I look over at Peewee to his reaction about the pie, and he just smiles at me in a daze. Probably still dazzled by that kiss I gave him. I snap my fingers in his face, and he shows no reaction.

"The tributes will have 60 seconds to eat as many pies as they can. Only the top 12 people who have eaten the most pies, will move on to the strength round," says Ranch.

"Hehe yes..." says Claudia once again.

Is that all she says?!

The GameCreators bring out plates to each tribute, and set it on the table in front of them. There are 30 full sized pies on the plates in front of me. I gag and look over at Peewee, who is finally brought back into reality when he sees the pies. He looks at me,

"I love pie! I make them all the time at the Bakery!"

Oh that's just not fair.

After everybody has their plates of pie in front of them, Ranch says,

"Alright! It looks like we're ready to start! Ready...Set...Go!" he screams.

My life flashes before my eyes as I force the cherry pie down my throat.