The Derp Games

Chapter 4

"Alright guys, its time for your training," says Hammy. I don't really like Hammy, he's always telling me what to do.

"What are your skills?" says Hammy.

"EATING," I say without thinking. Everybody stares at me.

"Good. You'll probably pass the food round like a pro. And you Peewee?" says Hammy.

"Eh. I'm good at making food," whispers Peewee.

Hammy and I look at each other and start laughing hysterically. That's not a skill! What a loser.

Hammy slaps Peewee across the mouth,

"Get serious boy. What are your skills?" Hammy says while gazing into Peewee's soul.

"I'm kind of strong," says Peewee.

"From what? Lifting sacks of flour?" I laugh.

"Actually, yes," Peewee glares at me.

"Right...So maybe you'll have some sort of chance in the strength round. Do you guys have any sort of reflexes?" says Hammy.

"Well I hunt berries with my friend Garth," I say. Ahh Garth. My pal. I miss that son of a gun. He was like a brother to me, only much cooler. Garth should have been here instead of Peewee.

"Good," says Hammy. He doesn't even bother asking Peewee. He knows that he's no good at anything.

Peewee and I are later brought to the training room. In one corner of the room is piles of food and a stopwatch, so you can see how much food you can eat in limited time. I don't think I even need to practice that. In the other corner of the room is a huge Wrestling mat filled with most of the tributes. I see the girl from District 1, Shiny and the girl from District 2, Chop wrestling it out while the boys from their Districts, Marty and Cradle watch them. In the third corner of the room is a large tennis court to test your reflexes. I pull Peewee towards the food and we spend the entire training time eating. I find out that I can eat 30 hotdogs in a minute and 45 seconds. Peewee can only eat 5 in the same amount of time.

Hammy had told us that we are going to have to show our skills to the GameCreators after training, but they changed it this year. It turns out that the GameCreators were watching us all during training this year and scored us on that instead. They're supposed to score us on a scale from 1-12 and we get the scores as soon as we get back to our rooms.

We all sit down and watch the boring scores of the other Districts. Then the announcer, Ranch Puncherman finally gets to District 12.

"Peewee ArfArf with a score of....2" Ranch giggles to himself. That's the lowest score of the day. I turn to Peewee,

"Hey, that was a nice try buddy. Maybe next time," I pat him on the back.

"Dogpiss Limabean with a score of 11!"

"WOOO!!!! HELL YEAH! TAKE THAT PEEWEE!"

Peewee gets up and runs to his room, after throwing an extreme temper tantrum.