Not All Angels Have Wings (L.H)

Chapter 14

I look down at my hands as the gravel that lays beneath them grinds into my palms. A tear falls from my face as the emotional pain in my chest begins to spread from my core and to the rest of my body.
I'm not sure when I ended up on my hands and knees but I do know that I had been pushed and standing in front of me was the only person on the street. The blonde haired boy stood there with a smirk on his face and satisfaction in his eyes as he looked down upon me and took a step forward.

"I don't even know why I gave you even a sliver of my time."

"Please, Luke. Don't do this."

At the sound of his name he leaned into my face and spoke the the three words that finally did me over. "I.Hate.You." With those final words he turned on his heel and walked away. The tears were running down my face as I sobbed with only the wind to hear and let my new reality come crashing down on me.

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I shot up from my laying position and began gasping. When I brought up my hand to my forehead I could feel the sweat that had began to form. My shirt was sticking to my back from the sweat and my hair stuck to the back of neck. I pulled my legs up to chest and rested my head on my knees as I tried to catch my breath.

It was just a dream.

I kept repeating those words in my head as I started to reach a normal state again and compose myself. It was the third time sense our first date that I have a dream like that and it was starting to wear me down. I knew the other boys and Luke had noticed my decline as well. Michael and Calum would always talk when they thought I couldn't hear and Ashton would ask we several times a day if I needed anything. Luke was the same way, he always asked if I was okay and I swear if one more person asks i'm going to snap. 
These dreams have happened every night and each time Luke has left me in one way or another. Usually I stay up afterwards because the first night had taught me that each time I go back to sleep the dream will start again and it was torture.  When I look at the clock now it says 7:00am and I am thankful for not having another night of trying to keep my eyes open.
I get out of bed and walk into my bathroom to get a shower and what I see in the reflection scares me. My eyes have dark bags and my skin has become very pale. I place my hands on the counter to hold my weight as I close my eyes and take a deep breath. The boys will surely have a ton of things to say about my worsening appearance but right now I don't want to think about them and I just want to focus on my shower.  I pick up my foot and step into the warm water, it instantly releases some of the sleepiness from my body that has piled up over the last couple days. My arms begin to get numb after only washing my hair for 5 seconds due to not having energy and so I quickly rinse it out and step out of the shower after washing my body. These dreams are starting to take the joy out of everyday things and im tired of it.

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When I got home from school I went straight to the couch and laid down. Between the two tests I had and the stares from people, my day had been exhausting. Luke had offered to take me home during lunch but I can't keep letting these dreams take over my life and control what I do.

Right as I was about to close my eyes and try to take a nap, there was a knock at the door. I got up from my laying position and walked across the room. Right as I reached the door the person knocked again as if they were growing impatient. I yanked the door open to find Ashton standing there with a 6-pack of redbull. "Hey, I thought you might need these from the looks of you." I stepped aside to let him in and rolled my eyes. "Thanks." He walked over to the couch and sat down after grabbing two of the drinks and giving me one. I opened it and chugged half of it before putting it down. Ashton looked at me with surprise and then shook his head. "So are you going to tell me whats wrong?"

"I don't know what your referring to." I looked away from him to try and hide the fact that I was lying. "Ainsley, I have known you for most of my life. I know when something is wrong. Plus I can tell when your lying." He chuckled as he said the last part. "Now we can do this the hard way or the easy way." I wasn't exactly sure what the hard way was but I knew Ashton loved tickling so I gave in. "Its horrible Ashton," I looked at him and I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes. "I have these dreams and they won't stop. Every night they come and its getting to the point were I wont sleep just to make them stop." I let out a small sob as I finally told someone what I had been holding in for days. I felt his arms slide around me as I leaned into his chest and cried. "Does anyone know about this?" He leans back a little to look at my face. I just shook my head no as I tried to regain my composure. "What are they about?"

"Luke," Ashtons lips pressed into a hard line as I started talking, worry was clear in his eyes. "Every time he leaves me in one way or another. He says these horrible things about me being worthless." The little composure I had regained vanished as I relived my dreams in my head. Ashton just held me as I cried out 4 days worth of emotions. He gently stroked my hair for a couple minutes before speaking. "Maybe you should go see someone about it." I sat up and looked a Ashton. "Um no, I won't go and do that. You know how I feel about therapy." He rolled his eyes. "Ainsley, going to talk to a therapist doesn't mean your crazy. It means your strong enough to know when you need help." I sat there thinking about his words. "Do you really think I should." He nodded his head encouragingly with a small smile. "Okay, but if I go you can't let anyone know. Not even Luke. He can't know about any of this." He had a look on his face that I knew from years of knowing him. He wasn't happy and knew something would go wrong but I didn't care, Luke could never known. "Fine, Luke will never know."

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Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in a while I have been busy with school and my dance. I finally got 950 reads and I'm so happy! Thank you to my readers