Unsuspecting Hero (Batjokes)

Chapter 8

Bruce walked into the kitchen with a smile, watching as Alfred set up the last of the cutlery. He took notice of the extra chair set up next to Damien's usual spot, and sighed. "Do you think he really will join us, Al?" Bruce found himself asking despite himself, and Alfred couldn't contain his smile. 

"I have a hunch that he will, sir. Though, it will be hard for him, no doubt. I suspect you may want something to thank him with if he does show sir, so an ice cream sundae is sat in the freezer just in case"

"Thank you, Alfred" At those words, his two children walked in, giggling to themselves. Dick was giving Damien a piggy-back ride, swirling him round playfully as the small child squealed with delight. Afterwards, Dick let Damien climb down, and the little boy ran to his chair with a laugh. "Is that Jack's chair?" He asked, looking up at his father as he pointed to the seat next to him.

"Yes, if he does show up" "Do you think he will?" Grayson asked, voicing the same thought Bruce had moments ago. Alfred chuckled softly, almost as if he was in on a joke that the family wasn't. Bruce gave him a confused glance, before turning to his oldest son. "Alfred seems to think so, but I'm not sure"

"I think he will" Damien said with a smile, toying with his cutlery as Bruce and Dick also sat themselves down in their own chairs, Alfred retreating to the kitchen to bring out the plates. "If he does, it won't be for himself, that's for sure. He'll just wanna see Damien" Dick chuckled, Bruce smiling.

Alfred came out and dished out the plates in front of his family. He left a full plate of food in front of the chair next to Damien, before sitting himself down to eat as well. The family hesitantly began to dig in after a moments hesitation. Dick began to start up conversation, albeit awkwardly. "So, what should we call him? Jack, Joker?"

"Joker's fine, for now" A voice spoke in the doorway, and all four occupants of the room looked up. There Joker stood, in a purple crop top and black joggers that Bruce had left in his room an hour before. He hesitantly strode over to the plate that was left for him, trying to portray his confidence where it lacked. "Before I eat, there will be ground rules"

"Ground rules...?" Bruce mumbled, before nodding softly. "Number one, I don't care who you set up as my therapist or whatever, but if it is anyone from Arkham, the deal is off!" Joker spoke sternly. "Number two, I wanna be involved in catching Harvey. I don't care if you think it will set me back on my 'rehabilitation' or whatever. If you find out anything, I'm the first to be told. If you need help catching him, you won't ask your bird children, or Harley, or the GCPD, you will ask me! ...those are my conditions" He finished flatly, looking away from Bruce hesitantly.

"...deal. I can work with those conditions" Bruce spoke, ignoring the incredulous looks from Alfred and Dick. Still, he followed it up with; "but if anyone is ever killed, the deal will be off on my end"

"...fine" Joker mumbled, fiddling with his fingers underneath the table. His breath hitched, body stiffening as he felt a hand resting on his own. Looking to his right, Alfred sat with a smile, hand gently patting as if to say 'thank you'. Joker felt himself softening as he nodded at Alfred, feeling less tense than when he entered the room.

When he reached up and picked up his own cutlery to eat, the conversation began to start again. "So...how are you, Joker?" Dick asked awkwardly, unsure of what to say but the clown still decided to roll with it. "Well, considering I'm sat at a table having dinner with my arch nemesis and his family, I've obviously lost the plot more than usual" He chuckled, earning a smirk from Bruce. "Arch nemesis...strong word for two men who only fight just so they can flirt with eachother" Grayson teased, earning a awkward cough from Bruce and a laugh from Joker.

"Oh please, your dad is so far in the closet that he probably has no idea what you're even talking about" Joker grinned, looking toward Bruce with a gleam in his eye. "Isn't that right, Batsy?" "What? Let's talk about something else..." Bruce mumbled, earning a chuckle from the adults of the table. 

"Did you know Jack can draw? He draws really good!" Damien pipped up, and Joker smiled fondly. "Oh, really?" Bruce asked, looking down at his youngest son with interest. "Yeah! Though, he draws weird stuff"

"What? Hey!" Joker laughed, earning a snort from Bruce.

Joker dug into the steak in front on him, and thought fondly about how he could probably get used to this.

~~~~~~

Dinner ended smoothly, Joker devouring his Ice cream with a happy hum of each bite. 

Afterwards, Joker thought he was going to be shown to his room. So he was surprised when Bruce began to lead him to the library. "Where are we going?" 

"Last night, I talked to Harley Quinn" Bruce began, walking over toward a particular bookshelf. He pulled one of the books out, then another, then another. Joker quickly caught onto the pattern, and watched as Bruce pushed all three books back in at the same time. A click sounded shortly afterwards, and the bookshelf began to move to the side, revealing a secret passage.

"She told me everything she knew, and also provided some evidence for me. I was going to talk to you about it anyway, but now that you want to be involved with the investigation, it seemed only right to tell you now" Bruce said, leading them both down the stairs. Joker felt a draft from down below, and shivered slightly as they reached the bottom of the stairs.

Deadpan, Joker spoke. "The Batcave?" "The Batcave" Bruce confirmed, walking inside and toward a giant monitor in the middle of the room. Joker followed, slowly. "I have to admit, this is fucking underwhelming. It's so...plain. So boring! Though I guess that suits you, doesn't it Bats?" Joker giggled softly.

Bruce rolled his eyes, pulling out a chair for Joker to sit on. With both of them sat down in front of the computer, he pulled out the hard drive from last night. "What's that?" Joker asked, staring at it confused.

"Harley said that she had lent you some of her henchmen during that bank heist you pulled. After you went missing, one of her men saw you with Harvey. She went to one of his old hideouts to ask about you, and he wasn't there. But he did know she had showed up, and he sent her a video"

"A video?" Joker asked, feeling apprehension at the back of his mind but pushing it away. "It was a video of Harvey's men raping you" 

Joker looked at the stick in Bruce's hand with a cold gaze. "Is that what is on there?"

"Yes, along with something else. Harley needed help tracking you down, and she turned to Riddler. Nigma managed to hack the security camera's of the building you were being kept in. Along with that video Harley was sent, there is also two weeks worth of that camera footage"

"...that's how Harley found me?" Joker mumbled the question hesitantly, and Bruce couldn't help the sympathy that held in his tone. "Yes. She had to wait for a blind spot before saving you"

"No" Joker quickly said. "That's too easy. Harvey was too good at covering his tracks and what he was doing the entire time. He wanted Harley to save me" Bruce contemplated that for a moment. "It could have just been a slip up?" "After a year, yes. But after a month? We both know Harvey never gets messy like that. Me being saved was part of some plan of his"

"Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, these videos might have something. I need your permission to watch them" 

"My permission?" Joker spat, glaring at Bruce with a scared tint to his gaze. He seemed to have something to say, but the words died in his throat. Instead, Bruce watched with pity as Joker's expression crumbled into one of fear. "You need my permission"

"Yes" Bruce confirmed, reaching out to take one of the other mans hands into his own. "If you say no, then I won't touch them. It's up to you"

Joker fell silent, glaring at the floor as he thought about it. The only thing that grounded him was the gentle stroke of Bruce's thumb along the back of his hand. He found himself melting into the touch, taking in a shaky breath as he looked back up at the other man.

"You can watch them, but I want to watch them with you"