Chapter Nineteen

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ocean blue eyes, looking in mine, i feel like i might sink and drown and die


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Tessa jolted awake to the feeling of her shadows pulling at her, their power thrumming through her body. She could feel their restlessness, almost urgency as they ripped her from her sleep. She blinked her eyes open and stared into darkness—not the usual night, where her eyes would adjust in the glow of the moon—but pure, unending darkness.

She blinked once, then again, a thread of panic rising within her as she assumed something was wrong with her eyes until—there. The tugging wasn't just coming from her shadows, it was coming from within her, that string within her soul that tied her to Nyx. All at once awareness rushed in and she realised the darkness was him—his power.

His arms were tight around her waist and she felt him shudder, hearing his head toss to the side on the pillow behind her. She tried to turn in his arms but his grip wouldn't allow it and even when she craned her neck she couldn't see a thing.

"Nyx," she called softly, worriedly; as she attempted to rouse him. Nothing. "Nyx..." Tessa said more urgently as she felt the bed start to shake, his power churning through the room as she forced her shadows to curl around him.

"Nyx, wake up." She squeezed his arms tightly, feeling his face come to rest in the juncture between her neck and her shoulder. She heard him whisper her name and thought she had been successful for a moment, until the floor beneath them began to vibrate too.

She knew now that whatever nightmare he was having, it was about her—probably losing her—and she reached behind her head, running a hand through his hair. "Nyx, please." She pressed herself back against him as hard as she could. "I'm right here, wake up." As the floor's vibration turned to shaking she felt deep within her for that string again and yanked. His talons sprang from his fingers and she hissed as they sliced deep into her arms.

She tried to calm her racing heart, breathing deeply. Panicking wouldn't help—he could probably feel that. She tried to drop her barriers and push a feeling of love towards him like she had done two nights previous, but it was like she hit a wall. The room was thick with the tang of magic and the smell of her own blood and she finally started to struggle against his hold.

She heard the door bang open but still couldn't see a foot in front of her. "Nyx!" That was Rhysand's voice.

"Rhys," Tessa called, her tone becoming slightly desperate. "I can't wake him, I don't know what to do!" There was no answer, but she could feel Nyx let out a harsh breath against her neck, arms tightening around her once more before his grip went slack. All at once the moonlight streamed back in and she was looking at Rhys and Feyre in the doorway, the former's eyes glassed over, his brows furrowed in concentration.

She felt the minute Nyx woke, his body jerking with a gasp. Finally his arms loosened enough for her to clamber upright, twisting to face him as she came to rest on her knees. She breathed out in relief, reaching out for him. "Are you ok?"

She saw the moment he noticed her arms, his eyes fixating on the streams of blood dripping down to stain the sheets. "I'm fine." She said immediately, trying to pull his attention away from them. Feyre stepped up beside her, reaching out for Tessa's arms gently, healing power thrumming through her as she easily closed the wounds.

"See?" She reassured him. "It's nothing." She reached out to touch his face. "Are you ok?" He still hadn't answered her.

"I'm sorry," he croaked and Tessa shook her head immediately. "What's there to be sorry about? A couple of scratches?" Rhysand clicked his fingers and the blood disappeared from the room.

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