Thick as Thieves

VI

CAITLIN

"Look at me." Chris' fingers grip my chin, and I flinch as he tilts my head, forcing me to make eye contact. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me."

My nose stings as tears threaten. "There's no excuse for putting your hands on me."

"And you're right. I am a louse of a man for touching you like that. But my jealousy got the best of me. To think of someone else getting to touch what's mine -- to imagine Bea and you behind my back -- angers me. You're mine, Pet. Not hers. Not anyone else's." He sighs and softens his stare. "Tell me you forgive me."

Jealousy is no excuse. He can't talk himself out of this one. "Chris..."

"Please, Pet," he begs. "I love you. Let me show you how sorry I am."

I close my eyes as he brushes his fingertips down my cheek. I can't bear to look at him when he spits those tainted words in my face, like that's going to fix things. His touch feels cold, unlike when Bea had her hands on me. The way her chest felt pressed against my naked one. Pieces of last night have been slowly coming back. The way she carried me into my room. The way she confessed to always wanting to be with me. The comfort I felt knowing she would never hurt me physically or emotionally.

I shouldn't have asked her to stay with me, but I needed her. And waking up this morning made me realize that I may need her more than before.

"Chris, I can't --"

Chris places his thumb over my lips, silencing my words. "Don't make any decisions now. Think about it. Let me show you how much you mean to me. I promise, nothing like that will happen again." He motions for the roses. "I brought those as a peace offering -- to show you just how sorry I was." Then he smirks. "Besides, you have to forgive me. What will your family say if they found out you broke my heart?"

His lame attempt at a joke has my mind churning with thoughts. What will my family say? My mother will be heartbroken that I let the best catch -- in her eyes -- go. My siblings will be mad, thinking I wasted a good thing. No one would believe me if I said Chris was the bad guy.

Perfect Chris.

I close my eyes, fighting back tears. He's right. My family would be disappointed in my.

"We can work through this," he assures me in his normal, reasonable Chris way. "Let's get some dinner later and we can go see that movie you've been dying to see."

Fight, Caitlin. Fight for what you want. Don't worry about what others will think.

He leans in and places a small kiss to my forehead. "Maybe we can pick up where we left off that one day on your couch. Please forgive me." Another kiss to my nose. "This is me begging, Pet. Forgive me." He places one last kiss to my numb lips and pulls away at the sound of his phone chirping.

Pulling it from his slacks, he checks the message and steps away. "This is important. We will continue this later. Are we okay?"

I can't do anything but stare at him. How can he think we are good? We are most definitely not okay. But how can I just stand here and say nothing? Because I'm a forgiving person and everyone deserves a second chance. Just like Justin and Paul and Jim?

He doesn't wait for my response. He leans in placing a quick peck to my lips. "I'll see you at work. Love you." And then he is walking out of my house.

I squeeze my eyes shut, fighting back the tears of guilt, shame, disappointment that I couldn't just stand up to him. I couldn't tell him we were done. My fists squeeze tight, and I hold my breath trying to fight off the anger inside me. It's when I break that I know I can't take any more. I throw my head back and scream. I scream so loud, if my neighbors weren't old and deaf, they would be concerned.