| Blurred Lines |

XV.

"It's not the right time but you say the timin' is perfect...
we doin' the most, takin' pictures you know we can't post."
Anna Mae | Summer Walker

Chapter XV| ᥫ᭡

A cloud of smoke surround Javi as he stared off in a deep thought, puffing on a blunt. In his other hand was a red cup filled with sizzrup. Faded was an understatement.
He was more than that.
      Javi was trying to focus on counting up the stack of bills in front of him, but Isis was heavily on his mind. He was still feeling regret for how things played out between them the other night, but he knew she was drunk and didn't want to take advantage of her or the situation. Javi was trying to listen to her feelings and keep things platonic. Lately their feelings had blurred the friendship line, but it was harmless fun. They hadn't done the deed they couldn't come back from. Even though Javi wanted to badly dick Isis the fuck down. He missed being inside her heavenly walls but nothing good would come from it until she cut completely ties with Caine. Until then, Javi couldn't see themselves reconnecting on that level. With Isis, he was selfish. With any other bitch, Javi wouldn't really give a fuck about another nigga shitting where he ate, but Isis was his little baby. Always was and always would be. She didn't deserve anything less than a nigga who saw and only had the joneses for her.
Javi wasn't so cavalier when it came to Isis. More so possessive, but not in a negative way. In a way, where he didn't want any other nigga knowing what heaven lied between her legs or soul. He understood the reservations she had towards reigniting that relationship between them though. Back then, the thought of being committed was the last thing on Javi's mind, but he was older and maturer now. Javi knew exactly who and what he wanted to be with.
"Why you lookin' like you lost yo bitch?" Ace joked slightly shoving his shoulder. It was almost three in the morning but Javi, Ace, Power, and Juice were in the warehouse, pulling yet another all nighter. A stack of cash surrounded them on the floor as they counted up the profits from the week. Working part time for his family business was how Javi earned majority of his money. Plus studio time wasn't cheap and until a major deal came through, slangin' was his current career path.
"Shut up, nigga." Javi responded, pushing his brother back. Ace snickered, shaking his head.
"Isis lil ass must have you in yo feelings." Ace replied, taking a sip of his drink. Javi ignored his comment, focusing on his count.
"Isis who? Isis, Isis? You fuckin' with Ice again nigga?" Juice quizzed.
"Shit he wishes." Ace continued clowning and Javi shook his head in annoyance.
"Then a nigga must have a genie grantin' all my wishes." Javi cockily rebutted back.
Ace smacked his lips in disbelief, "Yeah right nigga. Ice ain't fuckin' with yo ass."
"Yeah okay." Javi vaguely responded, not trying to convince him otherwise.
"What you do now?" Power asked making Javi suck his teeth.
"Why you assume I do somethin'?" Javi quizzed back, becoming defensive, but Power was just keeping it honest. He was oldest of all his cousins and tried to get them to learn from his mistakes. Especially when it came to a relationship with someone you really loved. Priya and Blanche typically listened, but his male cousins tended to be more stubborn.
Power slightly chuckled, "Cause I know you nigga. You claim you want to work shit out with her, but still fuckin' with Serenity."
"Man whatever. I didn't fuck up shit. We good." Javi responded matter of factly.
"So what's the problem?" Juice asked. Javi sighed, rubbing his hands over his face.
"She was drunk the other night..."
"Ahh shit. Say no more. Y'all slept together?" Ace cut him off.
"Nah. I stopped her. Shit just didn't feel right." Javi honestly replied, "She was drunk and obviously mad at that lame ass nigga."
"And?" Power quizzed.
Javi shrugged, "And now she's being distant."
"What you expect? You tell her you want her back, she makes a move and you diss her." Power said.
"It wasn't like that."
"Probably not to you, but put yourself in her shoes." Power replied. Javi exhaling deeply, leaning back into the couch. Frankly, he didn't want Isis to grow to hate him again, so stopping her felt like the right decision, but she'd been icing him out since then and Javi understood why. Her feelings were hurt. He could tell through the messages, there was some resentment, but that resentment was only her trying to mask what she really felt. Javi didn't want Isis to feel like he was leading her own or tryna run game, so for now, he was gonna step back.

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       The next day, Isis was busy at the salon, trying to keep her mind occupied. She been distracting herself all day, taking clients left and right. The feeling of embarrassment still hadn't passed and every time she closed her eyes she saw Javi rejecting her all over again. Him denying her very much bruised her ego. Isis hated how much of an effect he had in her. It wasn't fair for him to still be so deeply rooted into her soul. But frankly, Isis was confused. If Javi claimed to want her, why would have he denied her advances? He claimed it was because she was drunk, but she wasn't. At least not that much. Isis was still completely aware of what she was doing that night. It was obvious Javi didn't want her like her claimed he did and she was over letting herself be vulnerable just to end up being screwed over and over. So why continue to give love a chance? It just left her worn out and overworked and Isis was over giving more than she ever received.
Her phone began to the rang and she glanced at the caller ID seeing Caine call for the billionth time today. Isis groaned ignored his call, putting her phone on do not disturb. Right now she wanted to ignore all the problems she was dealing with in her love life. Isis already had enough on her plate and the stress of a complicated relationship was only adding to it.
"You gonna call him back or what?" Kenia asked, standing over her and watching as she declined Caine's call. Isis remained silent because she wasn't sure. Something inside of her really wanted to hear what weak excuse Caine would give this time. It sucked it had to be this way, but Caine continuously was forcing her hand. She'd always give in so easily which is why he constantly thought it was okay to treat her this way. But what did I expect? We never had a real relationship. Just a messy ass entanglement.
"I don't know." Isis truthfully responded.
"Well if I were you, I wouldn't. Let that nigga regret ever fucking you over, Ice." Kenia said, offering her advice.
"Yeah, but..."
"But nothing! How many times have you been through this shit with him?" Isis sighed, pouting slightly.
"I know, Ken. Everything you're saying is right. It's like I know he's know good for me, but I just keep going back."
"Exactly, Ice. Break the damn cycle." Isis nodded her head in agreement, focusing back on her client.
"Honestly Ken, I really don't wanna think about Caine's ass right now."
"Well then I guess don't look at who just walked in." Isis glanced towards the door of the salon and saw Caine coming closer with a bouquet of sunflowers and roses in his hand. Isis discreetly rolled her eyes before getting up and meeting him half way.
"What are you doing here, Caine?" She rudely interrogated, skipping the pleasantries.
"These are for you." He said, trying to be sweet handing her the flowers. Isis groaned on the inside. It's crazy how much of an effort he could give when we were on bad terms, she thought accepting them.
"Can we talk, please?" Caine pleaded.
"Why?" She rebutted and he sucked his teeth.
"C'mon, Ice. It's been over a month. We need to talk."
"Let's go outside." Isis suggested, leading him towards the door. She didn't want to have this conversation in the middle of the salon because the next words coming out of her mouth were going to be words Caine hadn't heard from her before.
"I'm sorry, Ice. I fucked up that night. You can't just walk away after everything we've been through." Caine said once they were alone outside. Isis shifted her weight, taking in his words as Caine continued, "I've been going crazy without you lately and then I heard you been out here with ol' boy... and I can't just give up on you without a fight." Isis scoffed, shaking her head in disbelief. It been over a month and until a couple of days ago, Caine hadn't tried to reach out once. Now it made since to why he reached out. It was obvious word had gotten through the grapevine and Isis knew Paige was the culprit.
"Is that the only reason why you're here? Because you heard about me being with someone else?" Isis quizzed, folding her arms over her chest.
"Nah man...look, I know I'm good at pushing you away, but I was going through some deep shit and I didn't know how to handle it." Isis rolled her eyes, not believing it. Caine had said that before, plenty of times. Isis was quiet amused. She knew everything Caine was going to stay to because every time he crawled back it was the same exact excuse and sometimes there wasn't even one. Foolishly she'd always allowed him back in, but this time nothing in her wanted to and everything in her was screaming not to fall for it this time.
"You've said that so many times before." She dryly replied.
"Ice, I promise I'll do better, just please don't leave me." Caine pleaded, grabbing her by the waist and trying pulling her close, but Isis pulled away.
"Don't, Caine."
"I can't just let you go,"
"You have to."
"I need you, Ice." Caine whispered in her ear, before softly kissing her neck. She doesn't make a move, but she can feel her nipples harden under her tank top.
I need you. Three simple words. Her heart ached at that but she'd heard that before and didn't believe it anymore. This is how she got wrapped back into this predicament last time and Isis couldn't do it anymore. "I need me more." She replied, before releasing herself from his hold and walking away. A weight instantly felt like was being pulled off her chest. Isis needed time for her and to find herself again. The distractions of love had taken focus from the things that mattered to her more.

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