𝔉𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤~ ℌ𝔬𝔟𝔦𝔢 𝔟𝔯𝔬𝔴𝔫

42

You booked yourself a motel to get away. You didn't want to stay with Janice with Miguel likely plotting something, but you couldn't stay here.

You could barely look at him before you left, he wouldn't even look at you. There was pain behind his eyes, but his face was frozen in his usual stoic expression.

"Y/N...", he said as if begging you to stay. You couldn't bring yourself to reply. You knew if you did he might convince you to stay.

"Will I see you again?", he asked mimicking the question you asked him when you first met. You struggled to find the words to say, holding back tears you kept your face blank.

"I'm not sure yet"

Your heart ached the moment you stepped out of the apartment, the tears began streaming down your cheeks. There was no turning back now, you'd made your decision.

Why did the right thing hurt so bad though.

~

How could I be so stupid? How could she be so stupid. I just wanted to protect her, was it too much to ask?

Though the more I thought the worse I felt. Maybe I shouldn't have told her, maybe I should've told her earlier. Or maybe this was for the best. She's gone. She's away from the danger, I can handle Spot without feeling like shes constantly in danger.

As happy as I was that she was safe. It still hurt.
Why did it hurt?
I'm Spiderman I shouldn't be so affected by a simple... break up? Could you even call it that? I don't remember if I ever even tried to make things official. Though it was probably for the best anyway. In the end she would leave best not to have a label on it when that happens.

The apartment felt so empty without her though... just her presence made this place better but now that was gone.

I couldn't get too hung up on this though. The cat wandered our home... my home letting out a mournful meow. He was already feeling the loss.

If she left she should be safe now... right?
But, I still returned to the spider HQ... I knew I couldn't stay in my universe permanently, so I'd made another watch. My own one that would keep me off Miguel's radar. I knew she should be safe now that she's left. Yet I still checked my canon events.
That had changed once more... though still not a great enough change to prevent her death. It felt like no matter what happened, no matter what I did to prevent it. She would still die and it would still hurt me...badly.
It was as if it was all some cruel joke. No matter what path I took, no matter how I avoided it death would always come for her.
Once back in my own universe I was still hit with the loneliness. My brain was telling me to get over it. Yet my heart wanted me to go after her.

"Hobie dearie how are you", Mrs Snell greeted giving me a hug her usual way of greeting. The one thing I always noticed was how thick she layered on her perfume and how it would stick to me for hours afterward.

"I'm quite well Mrs Snell. How are you?" I returned the greeting the old woman simply shrugged.

"Still old", she chuckled before looking around for a moment.

"Where's that girlfriend of yours?"

"Oh, she was never my girlfriend", I quickly explained hoping she would drop the topic.

"Are you sure dearie. She stayed here for quite a while, I was growing rather fond of the girl", she explained appearing deep in thought as she explained.

"Yeah. Well she won't be around any more Mrs Snell", I don't know why I felt so sad actually saying those words. I knew this and it wasn't going to change.

"Oh, that is quite a shame love. She really seemed to be in love with you"

"Well not anymore. I kept secrets and now I'm paying the price"

"Dearie, a love like that can't just be broken by keeping a few secrets... and I think you know that too", she added before returning to her apartment without another word.

Maybe I should try to fix things.

~

Laying on the hard motel bed the world around you felt so lifeless. You weren't sure how long it had been. Days? Weeks? No calls, no texts from Hobie. But what did you expect? An apology, Never.

Your parents always seemed to sense when you were at your lowest. Not that they knew, but the missed calls were piling up. You didn't want them to know about your current situation, so of course you told them you were staying with Janice, hoping that would deter them from visiting for at least a few more weeks.

The motel itself was torture. Though you endured it. The room was dusty and there were stains all through the bathroom. To make things worse the walls were thin, and the couple next door were loud.
You could barely sleep at night, and during the day you hardly did anything but sleep. You needed to take better care of yourself. You knew that, but you struggled to even wake up most days.

You wanted to call Hobie, but you doubted he'd accept your apology. It wasnt even your fault, but you suffered the consequences. He was probably doing better without you.

On a brighter note your articles were successful, but you couldn't even feel happy about them. Everytime you even thought about writing you thought about him.

The grumbling of your stomach reminded you to eat something. You didn't remember when you last ate. Maybe this would be a good time to try and get out for a bit.
Texting Janice she was quick to reply, they were more than happy to go out for... Lunch? Dinner?

Meeting at the agreed spot you were greeted with a rib crushing hug.

"Y/N I've missed you so much. What's it been two weeks? A month?", she laughed answering your question on how long it'd been.

"Yeah it's been a while. How've you been?" You asked as the two of you found a table.

"Not great. Miguel and I broke up. And it was for a such a stupid reason too", they rambled their voice high with irritation.

"I'm sorry to hear that"

"But that's enough about me. How are you? How's that boyfriend?", they questioned taking you back to the one person you didn't want to think about.

"Nothing good to report either, we went our separate ways", you replied doing your best to keep your emotions under control.

"Who needs guys anyways. We have each other", she added bringing the mood back up to its usual high. Janice was always able to cheer you up even in the worst scenarios. Things just didn't seem to effect her, no matter what she face she always bounced back immediately.

After long conversations, dinner and a few drinks the two of you went your seperate ways again.
Janice offered for you to stay at hers again, but you declined. You had to get back on your feet yourself.

Arriving at the motel it was mostly dark, the only light being from the locked reception. They locked the doors quite early you found that out the hard way. Stumbling to your room you may have had more drinks than you had originally accounted for.

Successfully getting into your room you fell onto the hard mattress, Drinking the half empty bottle of water by your bed it left a sour sting in your mouth, probably from the shitty motel water. Or all the alcohol you had. Tonight you noticed that your neighbours were silent. The first night in god knows how long where you'd actually be able to sleep.

10k reads TYSM for choosing this story. I hope you're enjoying it so far, there's still plenty more to come.