Roxanne

Chapter 23

(Right Here By Chase Atlantic)

Roxanne's Pov

The darkness lit up the room. The anxiety was rolling through my body as I got up, and changed. I put on sweatpants and a hoodie. I needed to clear my mind.

I need air.

I quietly opened the door to the spare room, walking through the hallway, slipping my ugg slippers on. I brushed my hair back with my fingers as I made it to the kitchen. My anxiety was rising with every step I took. I knew I was panicking about being doxxed. I knew the high that I was at, I was slowly crashing.

It's happening again.

I closed my eyes, slowly grabbing my keys to try and not make a sound. I looked over at the couch, Schlatt laid there sleeping. I grabbed my helmet and gloves, slowly walking towards the door. I unlocked the door, closing my eyes at the loud click it made.

I felt my breath hitch, and my body being turned. My back hit the door, and I looked up. He stared down at me, his hair a mess from laying down. He was wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants. He looked down at my hand, noticing my helmet.

"The hell are you doing?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

"I'm going out with my friends." I lied, looking at the small clock on Matteo's wall.

"No." He said, causing me to fill with anger.

"Don't waste your breath, I'm going either way." I tilted my head and he chuckled.

"I don't give a fuck, Roxanne." I took a step away from the door, pulling it open as his hand stopped it.

"What Schlatt?" I narrowed my eyes at him angrily and he huffed.

"Wait." He spoke sternly, holding up his finger.

He walked away from me, and disappeared into the darkness. I opened the door fully before closing it and stepping outside. I gripped the railing with my one free hand, and I felt my heart stop. I looked around me, making sure nobody was near me.

The door opened and the footsteps stopped right behind me. I didn't want to turn around because I was on the verge of a mental breakdown, and I didn't cry, I get angry instead. The last thing I needed to do is flip out on the one guy who is still here after all of this shit.

"Let's go." He grabbed my hand, walking through the apartment building like he knew the place.

I envied his confidence. Even though I am confident, he is so much more confident, so much more powerful than me. There is one thing that is different about us. No matter how much confidence or power we both have, I let what people say bother me, where he doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks.

That's where we are different.

We haven't really talked since we kissed. We both have been avoiding each other, but I guess all that tension is going to crack open now. Not only is there still this attraction between us, but now there is awkwardness because we kissed. Neither of us has made a move to talk about it, neither of us have made the move to even acknowledge that it happened.

What if he regrets it?

Do I regret it?

There were so many questions running through my head to the point I couldn't sleep. I was awake all day. I stayed in the spare room away from Schlatt and Matteo all day. I came out to eat and then I went back to the room. I needed time to think, I needed time to comprehend my options.