Phərømoneş; The Fællën Ælphå

Chapter 21

Keith's POV 

I didn't smell him, his pheromones. I gently bit my lip looking down, he looks at me then touch my head. It caught me off guard as he soon feel the side of my neck.

"How are you feeling?" He asks still feeling my face.

"I'm fine," 

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes," I confirm.

"Still, I bought some medicine and fruits," he said,  looking at me. "You're gonna take them," 

"But Mrs. Ross already…"

"Come on," 

My body automatically moves standing up, it's weird. Why is he doing this? Why am I here?

His eyes flashes a moment as he looks at me, he was staring at me silently. It's making me too nervous, I feel hot. I begin to play with my sleeve when I realized, I was still in shirt I swallow nervously. "Um… I was… well… your um…" 

No wonder I didn't realize he entered, I was wearing his clothes so I couldn't smell his pheromones. 

"Come on," he said getting up

He didn't say anything about his clothes, I didn't ask or say anything. I follow him to the kitchen he then washes his hands and takes out the fruits from the shopping bag, "do you like cake?" 

"Hm?" 

"Do you like strawberry cake?" 

"Uh, yeah," I nod slowly. 

He takes a cake and pull it out the container, taking a knife rinsing it off. First he slice the fruit gently, he held the knife quite awkwardly as if never held it before. Cutting half the apple and slicing it, up he cut mango and an already peeled pineapple. He then cut two slices of cake, that seems like a lot. 

"Now we go eat," he said.

"Ah, okay." 

I followed him as he directed me to the dining room, "eat," 

This wasn't an appropriate dinner if I must say, but I felt nervous by the eyes. He was leaned in front of me, he soon picked a pineapple and ate it. 

"Huh?" 

"I will eat what you don't want, don't worry." 

"Huh?" 

"Eat," 

Wait I wasn't supposed to eat all of it. 

"I didn't know," 

"Don't worry about it eat," he said.

I don't understand… why us he doing all this, I don't understand why am I here. We are supposed to be partners but we aren't doing what partners do, why am I here? What's the point of being here?

I ate more than I realized that time, I don't know why, or maybe I didn't eat much and think I do. 

Mr. Luxe confuses, I don't know what he wants from me. He watches me eat, brings me medicine lectures me when I don't eat on time, he asks me questions about me but don't really say anything about it or what he expects of me, I feel as though I'm just supposed to be here but what am I here for? 

What can I return to him? 

Am I supposed to watch him go to another even though I'm supposed to be his mate and partner? What am I supposed to do? Not knowing terrifies me like that time.

I remember, the blood soaking my pants, waking up to receiving the terrible news.

"I'm sorry Pip, but sadly... the baby didn't make it,"

I woke in cold sweat, I look beside me to see Mr. Luxe sleeping. I was hugging him, why was I hugging him?!

I should let go, but I don't want to. I want to hold on maybe just for tonight. Some comfort, I itch closer with a sniff, I didn't fall asleep I could only think and wonder.

If my child had made it, who would he look like me? Or Derek? I've never told my parents this but I blame myself for it. I was trying to take my own life but the little one protected me by giving up there life. What would that child be? Alpha or omega? My parents who where secretly checking on my child told me it was a girl, my girl would have been four now.

Sometimes I wonder and the guilt kept me up at night, I'm an evil person. A sinner like myself doesn't deserve happiness, I sit up unable to sleep. I went for my tablet then sat in the small sofa and started to draw, imagining my child. Each time I think about it I imagine my girl, Emmy she'd have that man's hair but my eyes. She'd be the sweetest girl in the world, she'd love cookies, she'd play with insects. Emmy could have been great, we could have been best of friends.