[Translation]
Freckles speaking
O'Malley talking
'Thoughts'
*Sound effects*
"I cannot take any more of this," Grif said to himself. He has been forced to listen to Donut ramble on for the last 5 minutes. At this point, he was wondering what bullets tasted like.
"So after I clipped my toenails, I was gonna apply the ointment as recommended. After all, I don't want this boil on my thigh and balls to keep aching. But I don't know, it just smelled really funny. You know the smell of vomit and piss? It was like that but worse. So, I decided to taste it, just to make sure it was safe." Donut TMI'd
"That's it! I'm committing suicide." Grif said as he ran off towards Blue base. If he was going to commit suicide, he might as well make the blues do it. That way his sister gets the life insurance money.
"Hey! I haven't finished retracing my steps yet. You don't even know what I did about the boil on my thigh." Donut shouted to him.
Grif wondered if willing going to Blue Base to be killed would be considered suicide in the eyes of God or not. However, Grif didn't get to ponder for long before seeing a tank start rolling towards him.
"Oh crap!" Grif shouts as he runs back down the small hill he was on and back towards the Warthog.
"Hey, you're back! So where was I? Oh yeah, I lanced it. Disgusting! *Shudders in disgust*" Donut says as he shutters in disgust. Also making noises of disgust.
"Not now, rookie! There's a giant tank out there that's about to steamroll right over us!" Grif shouts at Donut. Mostly to get him shut up, partially because he hates Donut's little tales. He never needed to know about thigh boils.
"What?!" Donut begins trying to hop near the Warthog, he hops up and down to see over the jeep and sees Sheila approaching. "Oh God, it's true! I'm freaking out! I'M FREAKING OUT!"
"Dude! Calm the fuck down and get back over here!" Grif shouted at the rookie.
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Scene change
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"Oh my God. I can't believe Caboose is smart enough to drive this thing and I'm not! Sheila, how the fuck do I slow you down?" Tucker said in frustration.
"Retard the throttle," Sheila replied.
"What throttle? This throttle?" Tucker asked as he pulled a lever, activating the windshield wipers.
"Retard the controller," Sheila answered.
"You mean this thing? What're you talking about, I'm so confused! Samus help me out!" Tucker exclaims.
"Maybe you should have let me drive." Samus retorts as she runs a little behind the tank.
"The controller, retard!" Sheila repeats.
"Oh, come on. Now you two are just being mean." Tuckers says in exasperation at the two. Then he notices how close they are to Red base. "Ahh, Sheila we have to slow down or we're gonna run into that jeep!'
Sheila's response is, "Please take evasive action. Please take evasive action."
"You take evasive action! Hey, Lopez, help me out! Can't you talk to her?" Tucker calls out.
"Perdóname. Pero no puedo hablar con mujeres bellas porque sudo. [Sorry. I'm not good at talking to beautiful women. I get sweaty.]" Lopez answers from the side of the tank.
YOU ARE READING
FR3CK13S
FanfictionFreckles is known as the loyal dog of one Michael J. Caboose. He appears during Season 11 and terrifies both Blues and Reds. He isn't really present after the Chorus arc, and has very little Screen time. But what if he appeared earlier. What if he w...
