Comfortable Silence (Shinsou Hitoshi x Mute! Gender Neutral Reader)

Chapter 13

Nervous isn't the right word. It's less like you feel jittery or like your nerves are off or in overdrive. It's more like your nerves are frayed and misplaced, like someone set you on fire and told you to live with it. It's more like someone shoving cement down your throat, making you promise to not choke it all up, telling you to find some hope in the Universe that you won't projectile vomit over everything.

It's erratic, if it's anything. You don't really know how else to explain it as you wait at a café table, glancing at the window every so often to see if your cousin is near. You might really puke if he does, but you hope you won't. Besides, you desperately need to get this over with.

 You hate feeling like you're sitting in your anger, hate the fact that there's you nothing you can do to expel it well enough. Most "Release your anger" health posters involved some sort of calm violence, or screaming or something. Things you never had the heart to do or simply couldn't. All you can do is work through whatever is bothering you, whether you liked it or not.

You hear the bell of the door ring, the sound of a chair pull across from you. You look up to see Maiko staring you down, both in anticipation and frustration.

"So..." he starts. "What is it you wanted to talk about?"

You suck in a breath. Let it out. Repeat it. Finally look him in the eyes, and for once you let yourself feel your anger towards Maiko. 

I want you to stop your prejudice against Shinsou. 

He just stares, waiting for you to continue. He knows, for once, finally, that it's not his turn to speak.

He hasn't done anything wrong, I don't get why you're being so damn hostile to him. As far as I'm aware, he doesn't even seem like he could even muster up being cruel or evil or whatever. You put your hands down, a silent permission to speak. 

Maiko sighs and rubs the space between his eyes. "Y/N, all those rumors come from somewhere, you know this. While I'm sure he's been..." he hesitates for a second longer than you'd like. "..Nice...You know what kind of shit is being said about him! I just want you to be surrounded by good people."

You close your eyes, sorting out your thoughts before your hands rise to sign again. They falter for a moment, debating the level of cruelty you might be capable of delivering.

...Like yourself?

"The hell is that supposed to mean?"

Good people? The same good people are treating a kid like they'll be the next villain they need to fight all for some rumors. You've had two interactions with him and it's already like you despise his very existence.

Maiko leans back in his chair and sighs. "So what, you think I'm so damn horrible for trying to keep you safe?"

Safe from what, Maiko? Safe from what? Shinsou? His quirk? Is that really what you're going to base my safety on? How dangerous he could be using his quirk could be?

"You're saying that like there's something wrong with tha-"

THATS NOT FAIR! You sign furiously, you barely notice the tears building up in your eyes. WHAT KIND OF HERO ARE YOU THAT JUDGE SOMEONE FOR THAT!

Maiko stares at you, mouth agape in shock. You watch his face contort with disbelief, to anger, to simmering regret. "...What say do you have in what kind of hero I am," he whispers, so quiet you can barely hear him. "What kind of opinion do you hold there, when you're not even able to be one yourself?"

He doesn't look at you. You can't tell if you want to hit him or cry or leave, so you just sit there, silent. Quiet, not because you can't speak, not because you're alone, but because, even if you could make noise, nothing would have left your throat. You're scared you might cry if you make any sound at all.