Take Me Away | ✓

» 11

P H O E N I X

It took a while for the police sirens to register in my head. The pulsing red and blue light made my eyes and head hurt even more than they already did. Slowly, I came to a stop and one glance in the rearview mirror told me that there was no way I'd be able to talk myself out of this one.

I was a mess. The clothes I had on were thin and even with a jacket, I felt cold to the bone. I also stank of booze. My lips stained a permanent red from the liquid. A bottle lay by my feet which filled me shame but was soon replaced by the dull feeling in my head.

It wasn't enough though. Not enough to make me forget the afternoon's events. How my fingernails dug into my palms making half moon shapes as I walked up the steps to Chloe's house and knocked on the door.

Her mom answered. "Phoenix?"

"Hi, Ms Marshall. Is Chloe in?" I twisted my fingers anxiously, wondering if coming here was a bad idea. But it was too late to turn back now.

Chloe's mom frowned, probably from hearing me address her so formally when I usually called her 'Sara' everytime I dropped by, and stepped aside to let me in. "It's good to see you, love. Chloe's just through there."

I thanked her and was about to turn on my heel when she pulled me into an embrace. Her scent was sweet and familiar, making me remember all the times she was a mother to me when my own wasn't. The thought in itself pulled at my heartstrings, leaving me exposed and vulnerable. Once again, I thought about how coming here was a bad idea.

"I'm sorry." She said quietly. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart."

I swallowed and bit the inside the inside of my cheek until I tasted blood. Once she let me go, I nodded with my eyes trained on my feet as I feared that I would break down if I made eye contact. I saw her own feet disappear from the hallway until it was just me.

Inhaling deeply, I opened the door Chloe was behind to see her on the couch, watching some sort of documentary on the television. She didn't look up at the sound of the door, eyes trained on the screen. I took a moment to take in my surroundings. The last time I was in this room was two months ago when the two of us were talking about college and tossing popcorn into our mouths. That felt like it happened centuries ago.

"Phee." I snapped my head back to the present and at Chloe who looked up at me nervously. "What are you doing here?"

"I don't know." I answered truthfully, tucking my hands in my pockets to feel the rough edges of the article I'd printed off this morning in the library. That was the other thing wrong here. By now I would have already told her about my findings instead of fumbling around for something to fill in the awkward silence.

"Are you here to talk about Matt?" She asked.

I sighed, crossing my arms over my chest to form a barrier except I wasn't sure what I was protecting myself from. "I don't know what I want anymore."

"I'm so--"

"You're sorry, I know. A lot of people are." My voice cracked at the last word so I turned my back to her. Nevertheless, I could still hear her getting up.

"Phee." She started softly. "Tell me what I can do to help."

I turned back around, a watery sheen now covering my eyes. Chloe took an anxious step forward. Her white sling and cast stood out like a sore spot. The cuts and scrapes on her face had healed well with the exception of the cut on her brow that refused to go away. I'd heard she'd even broken a couple of ribs but that didn't stop me from saying in a low, barely audible voice, "It shouldn't have been him."