THE LAST SECRET KEEPER Secret Keeper series books 1-4

CHAPTER 29

Prince Thorson proved Lanecea wouldn't spend a single moment alone, still holding her in his arms as they lay in the royal bed chamber, but he wasn't the only one who refused to leave the queen's side after dark.

"Do we have to leave tomorrow?" Revna raised her head from Lani's breast for a moment to search her brother's eyes. "Why can't we just stay here and do our lessons with our sisters?"

"You really should. You'd enjoy it much more. Perhaps your dad will agree to it if you ask nicely," Reagan suggested before catching a droplet of milk with her tongue as she looked over at her sibling. "It always helps if you start with, 'Daddy...please may I...' - I think it makes their hearts melt."

Lanecea couldn't help but smile at her mini-me. That had worked every single time with her father as well unless he had just recently bred her mother, then his heart was as hard as stone.

"I would love for you to be able to stay here with my children, but you won't be gone for long," Lani assured Revna as she stroked both of her girls' hair. "Thorson needs to return after he's finished his lessons - he has a kingdom to run now, of course, and wouldn't think of leaving you behind, isn't that right, My Darling Prince?"

"What she said," Thorson grinned as he assured his sister before kissing the queen. "Wild horses wouldn't be able to drag me away from you, but I am not sure if Dad told Mom we will be away and I don't want to cause any more problems. We can't be late for school but hopefully, Dad will understand and write a letter or something getting us out of school until the king returns. As for Mom...Lani, why don't you come home? It would solve this problem..."

Lanecea was silent for a few minutes, only the sound of the girls sucking her boobs heard within the bedroom. Even her wolves, lying at the foot of the bed, were watching Lanecea intently, as though they, too, awaited her answer. With her familiars at her side, and Thorson determined to protect her heart, maybe...

No.

"I've never told you about my dad..." Lanecea finally whispered. "You are so young and it is such a heartbreaking story, but when I was a child, my mother was very cruel to me. Your mother is not cruel like she was, but she and my mother have an awful lot in common and it does frighten me a lot. When I was at your farm, I was determined to keep my promise, helping her learn to be a good girl so your father will always be very happy, but my heart..."

Lanecea took a deep breath, focusing on the comforting sensation of breastfeeding while she attempted to collect her thoughts, desperately wanting the children to understand.

"My father, although he knew what my mom was up to, turned a blind eye to it whenever they bred. He would turn his heart against me and I would always lose his loyalty. My Dad was the one person in my house that I trusted to be there for me - to protect me from my wicked mother. Trust, you see, is very fragile. 

I don't mean to be afraid of so many things, but I cannot help it. It is just who I am. Secret Keepers are known to be very vulnerable, so I'm not exactly an odd duck. I trust your father to keep me safe just like I trusted my dad all those years, although I obviously don't think of Storm as my father - that would be just weird! Perhaps I am making a mess of what I am trying to say, but my trust in your dad is so deep that I believe he will take care of all my other fears. Does that make sense? If he loves me and is devoted to me, even though I am naturally afraid of many things, I am perfectly safe because when a man is devoted to a woman, he will never let anything harm her - not even a spider. Now, when he removes his devotion...when the bed squeaks...when, um...when I am less valuable to him even after his wife betrayed his trust...then...oh don't you see? I am left unprotected and feel like a ship lost at sea. My heart just cannot bear it..."

Thorson stroked Lanecea's hair as she lay in his arms, his sisters hugging Lani as they breastfed while the wolves lay in the bed as well, guarding their queen. Stroking Lanecea's hair usually calmed her almost immediately, but not tonight, the woman trembling, overwhelmed as she struggled to express how traumatic that squeaking bed was on her heart. She didn't have to say it aloud for Thorson to know he was holding that frightened, betrayed little girl in his arms.

"I understand," Thorson assured her, multitasking as he stroked her hair and caressed the queen's body at the same time. "You don't have to trust everyone though, you only ever have to trust me. Would you like to hear my secret?"

"Thank you, Thorson, and yes, I would."

The queen and the girls looked up at him, waiting with expectancy for Thorson to reveal his great secret.

"I'm going to marry you, Lani, I'm just waiting until I'm older. I still have a lot to learn so I will be the best devoted husband you could ever dream of. You deserve to know what it is like to be a treasured wife and I've loved you since I met you. See? You only ever have to trust me. I'll never let your heart be broken."

Lanecea was trapped beneath her girls, but she still wrapped her arms around the back of Thorson's neck, tears tumbling down her cheeks. She wasn't sure if he would still feel the same way when he was old enough to marry her, but the thought made her very happy.

"Thank you, My Prince...my vocabulary...here, feel my heart. It is going to burst out of my chest..." Lanecea reached for his hand, placing it just above her breast. 

Thorson grinned, feeling her out-of-control, electric, vibrating heartbeat beneath her bouncing boob. It said far more than her runaway vocabulary could have come up with.

"Thank you for loving me, Prince."

"How could I not?"

Lanecea didn't hear him, her thoughts a million miles away as she tried to imagine what it would be like to finally be a wife - a treasured wife at that.

Glorious. That is what it would be like.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

This was another very difficult chapter to write. I'm still wiping tears but I think it was important that Lani try to find words to express how she feels - why she feels so distraught. I am putting my entire heart and soul into this book and some chapters are seriously difficult to write. 

On another note, I've finally finished my research on the topic I wanted to cover in this book so plan to write a few more chapters today - possibly even completing the book.

I really hope you are enjoying it so far.