Chapter 13: Can't Breathe Without You, But I Have To

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A.N: This chapter contains an adult scene. Reader discretion is strongly advised.

❤️❤️

I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people, And sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time

SKY

I have no idea where exactly I was. Ang alam ko lang, nandito ako somewhere sa isang expressway sa bandang north ng Metro. From the airport, I kept driving for hours without a destination in mind. I just let myself absorb the pain from this new heartbreak. Iniyak ko na lang ang sakit while traversing the long road.

This ugly feeling is like Yesha Marie Carvajal all over again, napakasakit na iniwan ka ng taong mahal mo. Except that it wasn't Yesha. This time, it's Savannah Gabrielle Lucas, and part of her reason why she left was because of me.

Had I known that she would be away for a long while, I would have definitely treated her better from the start. So she wouldn't feel any resentment towards me. I guess she's right, it's too late now, kaya nasa huli talaga ang pagsisisi.

Naisip ko rin na kaya siguro ganun ang inasta niya kanina sa airport ay dahil wala ako nung graduation party niya, samantalang nangako ako na pupunta ako. Hindi nga siya nagtampo dahil sa gift niya sa akin, pero nagtampo naman siya dahil no-show ako sa party niya. I just shook my head in dismay.

To be fair, I'm genuinely happy for Sage to be given the opportunity to take her Masters abroad. Hindi kasi lahat ng mga nagtapos ng BSBA ay may ganung pagkakataon. Perhaps when I get better and my head is clear, I could also consider taking up an MBA after graduation. Tutal, I'm next in line sa leadership ng Yvasco Empire. May pakinabang ang matututunan ko dun for sure.

Gabi na dito sa expressway at nakaramdam na ako ng gutom. Wala pa akong kinain ngayong araw na 'to. Sakto naman na huminto ako sa isang gas station na may mga katabing restaurants. Kumain muna ako at nagpa-karga ulit ng gas bago ako nagpasya na umuwi na.

When I finally reached home, the whole place was dark and quiet. Past midnight na rin kasi. Akala ko ay makaka-derecho na ako sa kwarto ko when I saw my parents in the living room, waiting for me. They promptly stood up when they saw me.

"Ay sa wakas at nandito ka na, Kuya." Mama hugged me. "I'm so worried about you. Ang aga mong umalis kanina tapos ngayon ka lang umuwi. Hindi mo pa sinasagot ang mga tawag namin."

"Okay ka lang ba, Kuya?" Tanong ni Papa. "Did something turn up?"

I gazed at my parents looking so concerned for me. The next thing I knew, I broke down and cried in my mother's arms... again.

"Ma, iniwan na rin ako ni Savannah, at alam ko kung bakit. Napaka-gago ko kasi, kaya ang sakit-sakit."

"Oh no, not again, Kuya." Hindi ako binitawan ni Mama. Somehow relieved that she was here for me when I needed it the most.

❤️❤️

Now I don't know what to be without you around
And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me

Now I don't know what to be without you aroundAnd we know it's never simple, never easyNever a clean break, no one here to save me

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