i don't know how i'm going to get through this. my heart doesn't stop breaking and the tears continue to fall from my eyes. there are some days where i feel okay and i don't think too much. when the night comes, that's a different story. it starts getting dark around 4:30 and that's when i start to slip into the dark abyss of my mind. falling and falling, waiting to finally land on something but it never happens.
it's an awful feeling and i hate knowing that so many feel the same way that i do. i can't help but wonder if one day this feeling will just stop... or will it always be there? so many punctures to the heart, leaking out any love and strength it could carry. until one day, it's completely deflated and left with nothing.
my head thinks too much and far too fast. in the dark you see nothing but black, and that leaves so much space to fill up with thoughts. overthinking everything and overwhelming myself. it's a never ending carousel that i just wish would stop long enough for me to get off. i would run away if i could because i know it'll grab me by the back of my shirt and go round and round again.
my body physically aches from the loss, my chest hurts, my eyes heavy, hands are shaking. it feels like i'm dying and i hate that sometimes i wish i was. the pain would stop and so would the carousel. no more tears, no more worrying, no more sorrow. if i gave up, i would just end up taking it all with me and i want to let it all go so i can feel happiness once again.
YOU ARE READING
The Night The Stars Went Out
Poesíaa book of poetry about love and the grieving of losing that love. i am writing this as i learn to heal through the breakup and heartbreak of losing the one person i loved. this is a book of vulnerability, sadness but also strength. you are heard, yo...
