🌻 Chapter 42

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🌻

"Max, do you have a girlfriend?"

There is a pause. Silence. A few unintelligible noises, then, "WHAT?!" There is a sharpness to his voice. A warning to stop this line of questioning. I won't.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" There is a tone in my voice, a boldness, that I don't usually use with him.

"Brooklyn." He's annoyed.

"Please answer my question, Max. At KSU, do you have a girlfriend?"

He gives an exasperated sigh, "What the hell is this about? I'm not sure what you are even asking right now..."

"Please. Just tell me truthfully. Please, Max." I can't believe my voice is this calm.

He's super annoyed now, starting to get mad. "Brooklyn! YOU are my girlfriend! You know that! You've been my girlfriend since I was in fourth grade. I don't understand why you are asking this."

"Then who is Gwendolyn Raincraft?" I try to keep my voice steady while I brush away the tears still rolling down my cheeks.

"WHO?!" He's yelling now. "I HAVE NO IDEA WHO THAT IS!"

"She thinks she's your girlfriend. On her social media accounts there are pictures of the two of you together. She calls you her boyfriend."

"Brooklyn..." Again, it's a warning. I usually behave when he says my name this way. Not this time.

"You have a girlfriend at college, who is a cheerleader." It's a statement, not a question.

"Will you stop?! I don't have another girlfriend..."

"And you took her to a dance. She wore a pretty blue sparkly dress and you pinned a corsage on it. She said it was the best night of her life. On Valentine's Day you gave her roses and a necklace. She said she has the best boyfriend in the world."

I push the pictures around on the bed, looking at their shared moments. I briefly wonder what I was doing when they went to the dance. I remember I only got a card from Max for Valentine's Day this year. And it came a few days late. He was too busy with school to come home and visit.

"Wait a minute. Did you say social media?" He gasps like shocked by my behavior. "You know the rules, Brooklyn. You are not allowed on social media." 

A laugh almost gurgles from my throat at the irony. He allows his other girlfriend on social media.

"Did you make that rule so I didn't find out about your other girlfriends? Max, I..."

He cuts me off, "Listen to yourself! Would you listen to yourself?! That rule has been in place since we were kids! I wouldn't have even known about her back then." There it is. He knows her.

"Why?" I sniffle, "Why wouldn't you just break up with me? Why would you cheat?"

He sighs, "Listen, it isn't what you think. I consider YOU my girlfriend. She's just a girl I hang out with sometimes. Honestly..." He hesitates like he isn't sure he should say this. "...it's kind of your fault. Men have needs, Brooklyn. You refuse to have sex, so I had to find it in other places. I thought you'd prefer that I did it with one girl instead of many. You know, until you're ready." 

I catch my breath in shock at his words. I think the calmness of my voice has lulled him into admitting all of this. If I was yelling, he would still be denying it.

Many thoughts flow through my mind all at the same time. I'm shocked he just gave away much more than I suspected. I never suspected they did more than kiss. But they actually did it. I gag a little at the thought. And he just... how dare he blame me for his cheating?! I feel a pain fissure through my chest and my tears start dripping now.

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