so desperately obvious - Jake Webber x Johnnie Guilbert

my stalkers would have a feild day

Jake is driving them to the creepy ass Airbnb in his stupid Tesla, Johnnie is starting to wonder if them staying in random freaky locations is going to become a trend and he isn't sure how to feel about the idea.

"Jake," He starts, with an overtly sincere tone of voice, "I just want you to know that just 'cuz I'm emo does not mean that I'm currently suicidal.." Jake takes his eyes off the road to give him a sideways glance, smiling slightly.

"Check back in a few days for updates though.." Johnnie's smirk widens at his own joke and Jake rolls his eyes.

"Hey man, I'm just tryna keep your emo-ness rollin'.." Jake replies and Johnnie can tell that his friend narrowly avoids singing the Limp Bizkit song - he can picture the other yelling ROLLIN' ROLLIN' ROLLIN' ROLLIN', WHAT? so vividly and hates how fond he is of that fact.

"... your attitude's been a little too positive lately." Jake continues and the shorter man rolls his eyes dramatically, hoping that his friend catches the action.

Jake definitely saw the eye roll - "WHAT? It's your brand, you need the emo - I'm just helpin ya out here."

"Shut up, fuckface - you're just tryna get me killed so you can take my place." Okay, maybe that wasn't the best comment to make after recent events... ehh - what can you do?

"Hey!! I'd never let my dearest boyfriend die on my watch." Why does Jake always say the weirdest shit - and why does Johnnie wish it were true?

-

If only Johnnie knew the honesty behind that statement, how it's almost crushing Jake internally - like some kind of slow killing disease. He doesn't really think that Johnnie would appreciate being compared to a tapeworm but it is a poetic and accurate comparison.

"This ass is too hard for anyone to tame." Johnnie's putting on that stupid voice then does a little exaggerated hairflip (cute) and Jake rolls his eyes slightly, getting mildly concerned that they'll get stuck there if he keeps it up - even though he knows that's a myth.

"That's because no one wants you.." He deadpans, teasing, and his friend makes a little offended noise. Fuck, he wishes that wasn't so damn far from the truth.

-

"... You better have brought an extra jacket for me this time.."

Jake resists making a joke along the lines of  'get over it dude' -  because he knows reference to the jacket debacle will lead to the hypothermia debacle and the hospital and fuck-

"Johnniee, if you wanna cuddle again just say so" he smirks, gives the other man doe eyes then jerks his chin towards the back where he actually did bring an extra coat - even though it definitely won't be that cold. Johnnie isn't the only one with new fears, okay?

"Awwww you actually do care about me!" Johnnie's voice is sickly sweet like thick molasses and the disingenuous nature - the fact that he knows the other man doesn't fully believe it despite everything - makes Jake almost feel ill.

"Don't get your hopes too high now.." He chastises, waggling his finger in a goofy manner and Johnnie just squints at in a faux-glare.

-

They get to the Airbnb and no one's there - obviously - but there is an eerie vibe. It's genuinely in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by vast woodlands in front of a massive lake.

It's noontime and Jake can't help but notice the way that fog rolls off the body of water in waves, he isn't a superstitious man by any means but for some reason it brings up a memory. He rambles to Johnnie about this as the make their way to the front door.