Heliophilia
(n.) desire to stay in the sun; love of sunlight
To be loved is to be changed.
Arabella Dawson
Has never had anybody constant in her life. From parents always being away at work to one shitty friend, she doesn't know how to exist when...
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Yonderly (adj.) mentally or emotionally distant; absent-minded
Fourteen ♡︎♡︎♡︎ Flint
"Flint come on it's been hours now."
I ignore Navy, like I normally do, who's standing on the porch steps. Push the skateboard faster.
Trying my best to skate away from the people in the house. And the noise. And anything that isn't remotely silent and calm.
Grey would say I'm in one of my 'moods'. But how can I not be when the right side of my face is swelling rapidly and no one's done anything to stop it?
I push faster. Turning the board when I get to the end of the street. Forcing it to go back the way it came. Over and over and over again. Again and again and again. On repeat until I can no longer feel the sting in my cheek. The ache in my stomach. Or hear the noise in my head. Until I can no longer feel anything at all.
This is how it's always been. This is how it'll always be.
Navy rolls his eyes, re-enters the house. Leaving Blu the last man standing. Grey gave up 2 hours ago. Sterling never came out.
He sighs, feed up. Stands and stops in the middle of the pavement. Right in my path. Like that's going to stop me.
It didn't work 3 years ago and it's not going to work now.
I crash right into him. Both of us ending up a mess of tangled bodies on the floor. I don't give him the opportunity to hold me down, which is what he tried last week when this happened, instead hopping right back onto my feet. Ignoring the ache in my knees. And beginning to skate my path like I never stopped.
Blu stands with a huff. Giving up on trying to convince me to come inside and leaving me out in the cold.
They all give up eventually. Always have. Always will.
I skate. And skate. And skate. The same path over and over again. A straight line from one end of the street to the other. And back again. Always the same path. Never diverted.
Eventually the sun starts to rise again. And the birds start to sing. And the ache in my legs has long since passed. The noise in my head silent. The burning of my face a bitter memory.
Only then do I go back inside.
♡︎♡︎♡︎
I twiddle the pencil between my fingers. Resting my feet on the table in front of me I lean back in my seat.
Lunch time detentions only just started so I still got 35 minutes till I can leave.
