Heliophilia
(n.) desire to stay in the sun; love of sunlight
To be loved is to be changed.
Arabella Dawson
Has never had anybody constant in her life. From parents always being away at work to one shitty friend, she doesn't know how to exist when...
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Heliophilia (n.) desire to stay in the sun; love of sunlight
Thirty ♡︎♡︎♡︎ Flint
"Hi."
"Fuck off."
I don't turn my head to face her even when she sighs that sad fucking sigh of hers. The one that has my heart clawing to escape my chest and my hands itching to fix whatever's wrong.
She doesn't get to act weird and then pretend nothings happened.
"I'm sorry." Arabella whispers. From my peripheral vision I can see her tilt her head, trying to get me to look at her.
But right now the inside of my bare locker is more interesting. "Tell someone who cares."
I slam my locker door shut, walking away. Slowing down, despite myself, when she jogs to catch up with me.
"I'm really sorry Flint." She makes a grab for my arm but I shrug her off before she can turn me to face her.
Mainly because I know if look at her pretty face I'll crumble completely. And I'll accept her apologies. And I can't.
I can't do this push and pull with her.
She's either with me or she's out. There's no in between. No sometimes. On again off again. It's all or nothing.
"You've said." I mutter to the ground. Not having it in me to ignore her.
"It was my dad." Arabella stops, begging me to turn around. I stop too, facing away from her, hands clenched into fists at my side. Hating every part of this.
She takes a few deep breaths before elaborating further. I'm grateful the halls are empty, everyone already in class. "He came back for the weekend, promised he'd stay for the week, but he left Monday morning and I haven't heard from him since."
Turning my head to face her over my shoulder, my frown disappears when she offers me a tentative smile. "I was disappointed and sad and just wanted to be alone. I sunk in on myself. I didn't mean to be weird and distant with you."
My shoulder deflate, fists unclenching, fight leaving me. I turn to face her fully and just as I thought I would I crumble. Forgive her.
My heart starts to beat steady now she's in front of me and my blood no longer sounds so deafening.
Arabella smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes and looks a little scared. "Please don't stop being my friend."
