Meant To Be

Chapter thirty-nine

Zac stopped at the foot of the porch. Ronnie moved down the steps, feeling too far away from him. She liked his navy tee. The way it deepened his summer tan. "How are you doing?" she asked.

"Yeah. Fine too," he said.

Ronnie tilted her chin upwards, placing a hand above her brows to block the sun's glare "So, what brings you here?"

"To apologise," Zac paused. "For taking of that morning."

Ronnie smiled small, but it was grateful. She hoped Zac could see that. "Well, turns out I've a few things to apologise for too. For my ex-husband giving you the wrong idea, for me not trying to correct it."

"Ex, huh?"

"Ex," repeated Ronnie. Her hand was getting heavy now, so she removed it from her face, squinting. "The divorce is very much in progress. I heard he left that bit out."

"He did."

"Well I'm sorry about that."

"It's not your fault."

"Hmmm, the latter definitely is."

"No harm done," said Zac. He glanced back at the truck unsure of what to do now.

"Are you in a rush?" asked Ronnie.

The day was only warming up, but Zac, unable to move past the fictionalised conversation with Ronnie in his head, had nothing else planned for the hours ahead. "Not right now."

"Do you want a coffee? I can bring it out here, drink it on the porch?"

"Ok. I'll stay for a coffee."

Ronnie went back inside, passing her suitcase half filled with clothes in the living area. The rest were hanging on the washing line in the back garden. Stirring the coffee grains into the boiling water, Ronnie thought they would be dry soon as the clothes fluttered in the wind.

Zac thanked Ronnie, taking the mug from her. She sat down next to him on the step. He had taken his hat off, placing it behind him like he was going to stay a while. Ronnie liked the notion.

"Patrick left a few days ago," said Ronnie, and as usual, Zac didn't give much away. His features static. "Were you annoyed at me?"

"I'm too all over the place to be annoyed at you Ronnie."

Ronnie's grip loosened around the mug. There was a million ways she could say it, but he had freed her from the torture now. "I'm moving to Nashville. I've got a job in the General Hospital."

"There'll be a lot more happening there that's for sure."

"You say that like it's a good thing."

"Should I have said something different?"

"Ah no." An uncomfortable heat rushed through Ronnie. "I just wanted you to know that I'm leaving. I'm not expecting anything."

"I don't regret what happened between us," said Zac.

"Good, for I don't either."

Zac looked away from her. Ronnie watched his Adam's Apple shift, a mouthful of coffee traveling down his throat.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Fire away."

"Who's Dena?"

Zac didn't speak instantly, but when he said her name his lungs emptied, and he sat in such a way it was as if he was all alone in the world and couldn't wait to get out of it. "She was my Fiancée. She died. Almost eight months ago now."

"Fuck me."

Zac's mouth lifted at the corner. "I think that's the most honest reaction I've ever heard." Ronnie took her eyes towards the mountains, as if he needed the space. Truth was, she did. "The hardest thing is time passing. It's got fuck all to do with healing."

"Yeah, I get that," said Ronnie, her voice quiet. "What was Dena like?"

"She was golden."

Ronnie watched Dena consume Zac like he was becoming whole again. But she regretted asking, knowing it would be short lived, for when the time came for Zac to leave, the grief would be at its heaviest on his bones.

"Hidalgo was her horse. That winter before he was born, she slept in the barn for weeks waiting on him to make an appearance." Zac gave his eyes to Ronnie. "I think you two would've got along really well."

Ronnie smiled, wishing for Zac that that could've been the way of it.

"When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning."

"Quick turnaround."

"Yeah. I would rather just get on with it. Will you tell Helen and Jacob for me?"

"If that's what you want."

"Yes please. I'm not good with goodbyes of any kind."

Zac handed his mug to Ronnie. It was half full of coffee. Getting up, he reached for his hat. "I hope everything works out for you in Nashville Ronnie, but you know, it isn't far away. Don't make it seem like it is." He leaned in, kissing her on the cheek. She draped an arm around his shoulders.

"Aye, sure it's only over the road."

The end.