Meant To Be

Chapter twenty-one

The porch step whined. Zac's boots hitting heavy as he stepped two at a time. He banged his fist on the front door making it tremble. And then he did it again.

"Alright, alright, I'm coming." Casey rushed from the kitchen, drying her soapy hands on her jeans. Her boots were loud, rushing across the wooden floor until the long copper rug sucked out the sound. Opening the front door, the corner of her lips lifted seeing Zac, but when he failed to return the gesture, the easy way she held herself shifted. Casey didn't speak, nor did Zac. His eyes raiding her from the inside out.

"Why didn't you tell me you broke up with Mac?"

Casey was still holding the knob on the back of the door, turning it back and forward in her hand. "I was never in a relationship with Mac."

"Whatever it was, why did you call it off for?"

"I don't have to explain anything to you."

"Just tell me Casey," said Zac. When she never offered up an explanation he went at her again. "Or is he just another one of your puppy dogs?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Well, seems to me like you're just as good at stringing men along now as you were at high school."

Casey's heart flapped like a wild bird in a cage. She pulled the door back fully and stepped out onto the porch. Having been locked inside all morning working, the heat felt nice on her skin. She always missed the weather when she left. She had never really liked the extremity of New York seasons. She put up with it because the city had been good to her. She couldn't say the same about home. "Who do you think you are talking to me like that?" Casey's eyes rode Zac up and down. "What I do with Mac is none of your business."

"It is when everyone thinks you've finished with him because of me!"

"Don't kid yourself."

"Then why the hell aren't you in San Diego?"

"How the fuck was I supposed to leave when you almost killed yourself and then ended up at my front door!"

"So you are staying because of me?"

"Yeah. Fine. I stayed because of you Zac. Happy now?!"

Zac's head tipped back. He turned away from her on his heel, walking out to the edge of the step. "You should probably leave."

"That's very good of you, giving me permission to go." Zac heard Casey moving inside. He came behind and stuck his foot in the corner of the door. "Move your foot Zac."

"You tell me why you came back in the first place and I'll never bother you again." Zac's sincerity bled Casey like poison. She opened the door wide. Zac could see the whole way into the kitchen, the pans sitting by the sink, the plants on the windowsill, while every part of Casey angled at him like a lioness to her prey.

"I came back because Dena's dead."

"Why the fuck would you say that?"

"Because it's what you're thinking. You think I'm glad she's dead. You think I had this all planned out. I couldn't take you from her when she was alive so I'll do it when she's dead."

"Don't you talk about-"

"No Zac, I'll talk about Dena anyway I want." She watched his Adam's Apple bobble as he tramped her heart into the ground. "And in case it's not already clear, consider your counselling terminated." Casey hovered, she counted to five, praying to God he would start to scramble any moment now to save whatever was left between them. But all she could hear was desperate breathes and Zac's inability to fight for her when he needed her the most. "Fuck you Zac," said Casey and she slammed the door shut.